blurred about life's simple complexities

finally...

2009-07-19T16:51:00.002+08:00

i've decided to end it... :)

tech talk

2009-05-11T00:44:00.004+08:00

its just keeps hunting me... but oh well, chaiyen has it all typed out so i'll give her the credit and acknowledgement for it.

but i'll go on a different note.

i cant keep up with the technology too. seriously its very tiring.

not that i have a guy that leaves me sms and i reply his email and have a blackberry to even receive anything.. BUT its just keeping in touch with my friends. that's all.

when i say keeping in touch with friends, i specifically mean the ones that i dont meet at least once a month or call at least once a month type. its those friends that you've lost contact since we left the 'nest' and now in the world moving along with our own lives separately.

and thank you *seriously* to techies that came out with friendster and facebook. i can now see all my friends and keep in touch with them again - altho i personally do not think i have left them much messages that would help initiate the 'regular-keeping-in-touch-friends-forever' thingy.

sorry.. my bad. i'm quite hopeless in it.. *grin*

but~! i do see their pictures once in awhile when they pop on my news feed on their updates.

and.. i hate seeing it.. (-_-)

simply because after seeing all their pictures of some long lost friends that suddenly found me, i'll have these thoughts:

1. since when did (s)he get married..!?

2. wow! (s)he looked so different since highschool..!

3. aiyoh.. got kids already..!? isnt (s)he younger than me..?

4. seriously, (s)he can really dress up now.. looking so good

5. aww.. travelling all over the world - what work are they doing..?

6. (s)he got a foreigner as a partner..?? how did that happen..?

7. eh.. that fella that looks familiar...

8. whoa, change name already..

9. *gasp* (s)he know him/her..!?

10. err.. who's that again? do i know you? we have that many common friends??

so yea.. i get the heart-attack-updates from my friends.

from friends changing their names to a more puzzling names to change of status to change of looks - makes me wonder if i have changed anything since i left highschool till now. maybe a lil on the weight part.

dont get me wrong. i am happy for my friends progressing in their lives and going to a different level. just makes me wonder if i have myself. whether i have actually progressed to a different level.. or whather i still looked the same since i left highschool till now.

thats when i figured that everyone else has moved so far yet i'm still at the same spot.

oh well.. at least i still look like 16 years old.. *grining!!* hehehe

song in head: 21st century kid - jamie cullum

amazing

2009-03-18T11:42:00.004+08:00

i didnt realised its been one whole month that i havent updated my blog. and its almost coming to an end of march.

its not that i havent had anything happening to me.. more like too many things happened until no time to pay my bills..! and yes, i've had a lot of thoughts in my mind too that i wished i had time to let you all wonder with me.

anyway, as it is.. i'm now at...

took half day off cuz my car was cranking, screaming, yelling and whatever else that a car can possibly do. and what i like and dont like about servicing my car is that:

like: my mechanic does a good job and most of the time fixes the problem thats minor without charging me and give really good service too..
hates: reminder of my next service - need to change battery, engine moulting, tayars.. *ka-chiiiing!!* sigh..

other than that, let me put some thought together for a more proper update..

and here's a kiss from moi polka-dotted neice

for me of cuz.. you want, you ask from her yourself! =P

malas-ing moments

2009-02-01T22:12:00.005+08:00

no joke.. when i corbis a photo for the term 'lazing', i got this picture.. neat, huh?

anyway, yea.. i'm in my lazing moment - i'm on a 2 week holiday! i know.. you guys envy me.. but oh well.. *whatever*

hahaha..

well, it a fun time with my neices and my brother's family.. and of cuz, bringing my sis-in-law shopping - must show what kinda malls we have in msia that i can shop for 8 hrs.. *grin* also, my own excuse to do my own shopping too.

aside from that, my own malas-ing moments, i've been procrastinating to:
1. do research on cameras to buy - DSLR/Canon/Pentax/Pro/Entry..??
2. do my planning and personal budgetting for the year.. eh, with shopping a bit hard right?
3. do more reading - already behind alot of books i've been meaning to complete soon

oh well, i'm still in my malas-ing mood..

can anyone help on which camera to get? puhleezzz...... *blink blink blink*

my wish

2009-01-02T10:50:00.004+08:00

HAPPY 2009 TO Y'ALL..!!

c'mon.. i'm sure if 2009 wouldnt be as bad.. think positive..
have a cuppa.. =)

ps.. thats the new dog in the family.. welcome Shepherd the Dobermann.. hehe

extinct snails

2009-01-02T10:21:00.006+08:00

ever felt the feeling when you open you mailbox and you see a plain white envelope and it actually has a stamp and your name and address on it?

thats what i felt, when i went back home and opened a box of old mails. i've totally forgotten all about it until i decided to do some cleaning. and the feelings came back. along with a smile.

while reading thru the old mails, you could roughly guess what i wrote. and reading the replies, its.. highschool. asking typical highschool questions like - favourite sports, favourite bands, favourite singer, boyfriend/girlfriend, societies in school.. its really funny to read them back again. but its so.. highschool.

at least i think at my time. darn, suddenly it felt so long ago.. hehehe..

but i guess thru writting mails, i've learnt to communicate a lil with others outside my lil 'kampung' state. kinda allowed me to mix with other people that i prolly have no idea who and how that person actually looked like. oh, in my snail mails there's a constant request of asking for photographs. but we'd drag for the longest time before we actually sent out our photos.

then.. those mails started to get lesser and lesser..

because thats when internet became more common. first started as emails. then mIRC.. then ICQ.. which still exist till now with other fantastic web chat - msn, skype, gtalk, ym, etc. but there were community web pages that we'd try to keep in the loop like eCircles, Friendster and now.. Facebook.

slowly and obviously letter writting became extinct and even emails. hardly get any of those for the longest time cuz everyone would be posting short messages in facebook, friendster and if we could chat immediately with another person over msn and skype, why do we need to compose something?

i must admit, though, that i have lost contact with most of my pen-pals that i used to write to them. i do wonder what are they doing and how are they doing. who they are actually. after so much of writtings, everything just goes by, forgotten. i do have a couple of them still in contact but very briefly.

still, reading hand-written-posted-letters will always bring a smile.

song in head: photograph - nickleback

3

2008-12-22T17:08:00.006+08:00

just realised my weekend is about 3..

suddenly its like sesame street.. today we will learn the number 3.. *music playing at the background*

3 inches of my hair is gone.. maybe 4.. or 3.5... but oh well, i just had a haircut..!! hehehe
i might just do something to my hair again just before Chinese New Year.. hmmm

3 great friends to join me shopping for freaking 10hrs yesterday.. plus my haircut time of cuz and lunch and dinner time.. still, it wasa great time - who ever said 3's a crowd..?

and i just got my 3 lovely shirts from Yvonne Foong. i got to meet her this morning she's so sweet! seriously. anyway, if you all can - help her out and get the shirts. they're really really cool. i love the heart shape design. you can read up more abt her shirts here.

and know what, its 3 more days to Christmas. which means its holiday time! yippie..! oh, and 3 cars from KL (my friends) will be going back to my little humble town. isnt it lovely.. =)

oh well.. i'm liking it already so far.

but also, i realised last weekend when i sent my car for a wash

i had a nail stuck to my BRAND new tyres.. that also because my previous tyres had 2 nails stuck to it. that makes 3 nails to my tyre in less than a week.

all i need next is a cross.

anyway..

thats all kids from sesame street. today we learned the number 3..

*grin*

colour me friday

2008-12-12T11:06:00.003+08:00

how is it that anyone can NOT have a post-it on their table..?

shoooo ko-rour-full...

tis the month

2008-12-01T16:30:00.005+08:00

tis the time..
when somehow the days ends after then it should..

my current self dance-able song...

old school.. but reminds me of kenny roger's advertisement..

hahaha..

song in head: happy together - the turtles

shopping down memories

2008-11-17T13:49:00.004+08:00

need to shop for..

1. a new pair of casual work shoes
2. non-ironable, casual work clothes
3. magazine
4. funky cap
5. capris
6. funky necklace
7. camera
8. mp3 player
9. radio
10. storage boxes

and i got myself.. a casual tank top.

so much for retail therapy.

does anyone knows what is a letter pad or am i still stuck in the old memory style of writing letters in matching envelopes? i was hunting it all over in a megamall yesterday and it is as though it never existed before.

housemate: of cuz la! everyone's on email and msn already. who would want to write letter somemore..

thats a point.. but i still love receiving mails. only mails i get are wedding invitations!

song in head: stay - lisa loeb

friday-ness again

2008-11-07T10:49:00.003+08:00

well, how interesting can one friday be anyway? =)

anyway.. quote of the day from one of my friend..

"i had one good solid hour for breakfast this morning and i got to see the busy-ness in the life of other people"

song in head: forgive me - group 1 crew

over time

2008-11-05T11:28:00.003+08:00

eeks!

2008-10-17T12:20:00.003+08:00

sigh!!

another opportunity and i have to let it go..??

WHY..!?!!!!

and the remarks i've gotten..
dad: dowan la.. i want to see sharapova play only.
friends: wah! expensive la just to watch the oldies play
another friend: wah.. expensive! imagine going there without a camera..
and another friend: you free meh?

(-_-")

oh well.. to see john mcenroe quarrel with the umpire, with bjorn, with federer.. not too bad, right?

but then again, its on a weekday in bukit jalil.. and i have no idea how to get there. i guess, i'll just settle with ESPN.

so much for happy friday again.. sigh

boxed up

2008-10-10T18:42:00.003+08:00

gosh.. give me a break.. its a FRIDAY..

how can it be a black friday..

=(

part of time

2008-10-06T11:43:00.007+08:00

sis: Its sucks being old
me: hahaha.. isn't it part of life? i'm crossing over my quarter already.. sigh
sis: Haha! You got a lot of working years to go. That sucks too.
me: now THATS comforting..!!!

oh whatever...

song in head: one step at a time - jordin sparks

just friends

2008-09-29T14:13:00.002+08:00

before it ends

2008-09-29T10:16:00.001+08:00

tell me again why is it that i'm loving Malaysia's festive season..

oh yea.. the smooth traffic..

ahh.. divine... :)

fancy a cuppa anyone?

ps.. seriously.. this song is very.. erm.. danceable! hehehe

the list

2008-09-16T10:38:00.003+08:00

want to share your list too..?

song in head: say - john mayer

my precious

2008-09-16T10:29:00.003+08:00

well.. you want it too, wouldnt you.. hehehehe..

sigh.. *yawn*

my prayer

2008-09-02T15:07:00.001+08:00

song in head: ku mohon - sheila majid

a long overdue post

2008-08-21T17:02:00.004+08:00

which was suppose to take place.. well, last year. sorry why, yarn? hahahaha

here's my 50+1 reason i *heart* malaysia

with conjunction with merdeka this month, i thought i should actually put it to action. so here it is..

feed me!
51. mamak - there's food 24 hrs
50. food are cheap - with some exceptions of the expensive restaurants
49. varieties - from indian to chinese to malay to mixed all 3 together
48. durians!! - durian bomb, durian tart, durian icecream, durian mooncake, durian itself!!
47. conventional - ever had your fantastic coconut drink in a plastic bag tied with raphia string at one corner and a straw, of cuz.

entertain me
46. our own fav - mia palencia, roger wang, reza salleh, sheila majid.. and it goes on and on, and they're really good! am proud of them.
there were also peeps like KRU, Nora, Innuendo.. still proud of them too
45. sepet - and gubra, and mukhsin.. and many more from yasmin ahmad that shows so much of the malaysia culture and authentiness
44. rainforest world music - something i'm yet to go but want to go. seems to be happening every year.. soon! i shall attempt to go for it!

43. our style - our own version of entertainment like this for this and this for this
42. performances - cultural performance every chance we can get to show it off

people
41. mixture - we've got all the culture under one roof and we can still talk to each other
40. language - a chinese can speak tamil, a tamil speaks mandarin.. why do you think most of the support centers are here?
39. slang - we have our own slang 'lah', 'wat', 'leh' and to east malaysians 'bah'
38. colourfulness - aside from our own majority - malays, chinese and indians, there's also so many other people around the globe
37. fooled - so nice to be able to fool others with asian looks and hide our age, our language ability, our skill.. ahh..

achievements
36. tallest twin tower - c'mon be proud about it!
35. sports - nicol david, lee chong wei, rashid sidek, foo kok keong, and my sista! well many more names of cuz
34. our own car brand - may not be the best but we have our own brand, our own car!
33. seeing it differently - we have world class peeps too like louis pang, kid chan, kenny sia
32. here! - we have managed to hold a few main events where leaders come together - Commenwealth, F1, OIC, NAM, etc..

culture
31. mixed - seen an indian in baju kurung, chinese in sari? come here la
30. celebration - we celebrate all the festivals together, seriously - its a holiday! we celebrate!
29. richness - go to Melacca and experience historical nyonya, east malaysia, kelantan, penang, etc..
28. fashion - seriously, the traditional has gone modern and yet, there is the essence of it
27. freedom - to worship our faith

shopping haven
26. 1Utama - one of those malls that has so so many shops in one place, and its still growing!
25. Sunway Pyramid - another megamall that even has an ice ring in the middle of the mall
24. Starhill, The Gardens - extremely highclass mall then when i go, i can only afford to go to the toilet.. and nice too!
23. RM5 per entry - to the highest class toilet in The Gardens. any sponsors?
22. Pekan Rabu - and like every morning market, night market, shopping is everywhere

da place
21. strategic - in between thailand (shopping haven) and singapore (update haven) and easy to travel to any other countries
20. homes - you still amazingly find wooden houses, urban to the most unexplainable expensive houses
19. beach - c'mon, almost every state is near to a beach! how convenient
18. montains - mount K, y'all.. and i'm planning to climb one of the tallest in SEA
17. still - dont feel the earth move, dont see any spinning winds or vulcanic mountains

my 2nd home - KL
16. city - that never sleeps, and so does the jam on the road
15. food - williams mamak! chilli pan mee!
14. driving - a good driving practice for anyone
13. contradictory - kg baru in the middle of the heart of the city. but if you want to see a malay lifestyle, its beautiful
12. potential - so much potential in the people here and the place.. simply amazing

my home - Alor Star
11. cheap cheap - food are extremely cheap. imagine a bowl of noodles for only RM1.50!
10. lingo - we have our own lingo like 'hang' means you, 'kupang' means syilings, 'depa' means them, 'panaih' means hot
9. paddy - kedah aka rice bowl of malaysia cuz there's paddy field almost everywhere and sunset there is .. ahhhh.....
8. parking - a guy walks up to you, with a piece of paper and each hour cost 30 cents..
7. lorong titi siam - if you say it fast enough and understand it in hokkien, you'll know how the name came about.

somethings dont change
6. da squat toilet - always get a glee from my cousins from aussie
5. old newspaper - siren screaming 'suratkhabar lama.. old newspaper.. old magazine.. old batteries'
4. pasar malam - 'night market', altho not much a fan of it but i realised its unique
3. travel - we still have cabs with no meters, trishaws, bicycles
2. wrapped up - some food are still wrapped up in newspapers like putumayam.. nice!!

of cuz..
1. my home.

happy merdeka peeps.

greater things are yet to come,
greater things are still to be done in this city!
- God Of This City, Chris Tomlin

sorry..

2008-08-07T13:44:00.003+08:00

i might be away for awhile.. sorry...

dont worry.

i'm still fine :)

BIG - Pt 2

2008-07-28T13:52:00.001+08:00

the biggest part of our body - our flesh.

and its the biggest challenge for me..

sigh..

but anyhow, i shall kill it! before it kills me!!

no i'm not trying to burn my skin or flesh, lest i become bbq pork.

a continuation from my previous post, the 90 days fast - to which i still donno what i got myself into, my most precious thing.. my morning sleep. and most of the time, my flesh kills me first.

some may have no problem waking up in the morning and all - but i have major problem waking early if its not to the last spare minute i can indulge into my sleep.

i'm already convicted that devotion should be done in the morning - especially now with 'Give Me 40 Days' book.. i'm even more convicted. but *ARGH*;^%$#$#%$^;^*

*ahem*

but just as Christ has said it

Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. "Could you men not keep watch with me for one hour?" he asked Peter. "Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak."
Matthew 26: 40-41

lets keep to that advice.. we have gotta force ourselves to endure it.. even though many times we have no clue whats happening and what is actually going on.

"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."
2 Cor 4:16-18

so, just a random - no-to-sure - post this is, but something random which i hope it inspired you.. :)

BIG

2008-07-14T13:15:00.003+08:00

its been a very logn while since i actually talked something really deep.. not that i'm not capable of making others really confused with my words.. but yea, something deep..

today's the 14 of July - abt 1 month since i had an msn conversation with cissie on the topic we were suppose to read on jaeson ma.. what started as "did you know he's only 28..? *biggrin*" to end with a bigger commitment.. a 90-day fast.

the part that really triggered the entire conversation was that jaeson was really passionate to see college students not ashame of God. he wasnt so he didnt know what would the rest be. well, he fasted and prayed and *boom* he had a revival in his college of 2000 ppl! but the thing abt what he said was.. he wasnt satisfied with it. he wanted more! gila greedy..! but its what i want to be able to say that too! then of cuz he started praying even more for them and more accepted.

the thing abt it is, i admit and this is my point of view, is that the word revival doesnt quite exist anymore. its more like Martin Luther King's time or the great older dudes rallying the revival where the year at 1900s. not in this millenium.. but i was proven its not true. revival can still happen now. where am i in part of that revival? i havent a clue.. but i want to be part of it!

i want...

we've also heard of Louie Giglio and his Passion rally thats happening around the world. his videos shows the college people being part of it and committing themselves once again to Him. I guess, it isnt coincident that all these is happening now - this year - this country of MALAYSIA! i'm praying for a revival of the young generation to happen in Malaysia.

cissie and i were talking as to how we all pray abt revival happen but never seem to happen or that our fire in us doesnt last as long. thats why, we have decided to have to fast 90 days..

why on earth 90 days..?

uz that the 3 months challenge. lindy mentioned to us that many times whatever we do, never last longer than 3 months - some even before the month ends, whatever we want to do dies away and we're back to our old self. when i asked cissie how long should we fast, i was thinking.. "3 months? hmm.. shall not be too adventureous or i might just get into bigger trouble"
but she said "3 months!" *gulp*

so yes..i've gotten into a way bigger commitment now.. my fast? my morning sleep..! i would sleep to the last minute to get up and when i do.. forget abt quiet time and morning devotion - i'm late for work! its really not as easy as it is.. i still love my sleep.. :( i'm trying.. really hard!

cliche as is sounds.. and very typical "Christian" talk.. but hey, is it wrong for me to say it? i know the greater challenge is that to maintain that passion and what happens after the revival? i havent a clue whats going to happen.. heck, i havent a clue what happens after this year.. but still, will you rally together with us..?

lets pray for the next Malaysian, this generation of youth, this generation that would be ashamed of God. He's to great to hide

My Dad's BIG..

[ notes: this is only part 1 of what i want to say.. more to come! ]

hahaha

i heart books

2008-05-19T15:46:00.003+08:00

well, i've never quite been a bookworm kinda person.

okie, i'll rephrase that..

i never liked books.

ironically, i love hanging out in borders. mainly cause starbucks is there. and the feeling of being able to take some books (though you know you wont be buying them) and getting your coffee and read there.. ada gaya wei. hahaha.

but at the 'best selling' area or the '3 for the price of 2' area, the books there are actually pretty interesting. so, i thought, might as well try to read the 'so-called' famous books that others have talked about.

so, my first book that i've actually finished reading from cover to cover was 'da vinci code'. the only motivation for me to read that book was because the movie was coming out. and since there've been heaps of discussion and forum about it, i'd thought i'll read it and judge it for myself just before the movie came out. and its true.. the book is waaaay much better than the movie. by the way.. it took me 6 months to actually finish reading that book..! my mum took 1 week. so, i still couldnt understand how reading a book can be so 'exciting'.

then, my 2nd attempt to read a book. 2nd attempt to try to look 'smart'.

if you guys are trying to be in the same attempt as me - try reading this book: Tuesdays With Morrie - Mitch Albom. really a good book. i *heart* it alot!

a memoir of his favorite college professor, Morrie Schwartz, compiled from Albom's meetings with Morrie on Tuesdays during his fight with amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS, also known as Lou Gehrig's disease).

altho, his writing has alot to do with flashbacks and imaginery. and if you can cry at some part of the story.. fantastic la. some lesson to learn about life.

so, i've continued reading his books and most of them are about - someone dying, someone died, someone committed suicide... *smilez*

other books i've read - shame (jasvinder sanghera), ugly (constance briscoe)
no, i'm not in a morbid mode. its actually pretty interesting books..

anyone got any other books to recommend..?

"Once you learn how to die, you learn how to live."
- tuesdays with morrie

song in head: here in my home - various artiste

i heart ..

2008-05-19T15:09:00.004+08:00

just thought of *trying* to have a series of things for me to blog about.

so..

bare with me while i try to have this series of topic.. hahahaha..!!

:)

song in head: find 100 ways - james ingram

i want a kaki..!!!

2008-05-12T17:27:00.003+08:00

cant believe i'm saying this but...

i want to play tennis..!!

sigh..

i really want to play tennis..!!!

anyone wants to play with me..? i'll promise i wont complaint.. hehehe.. i just want to whack some strokes..

too much badminton is bad for me... *tsk tsk*

quick.. any takers..?? :D

all it takes is a muffin

2008-04-01T17:40:00.009+08:00

location: starbucks

they both had the best seats in the place. its a weekday and a new mall, so you wouldnt quite expect as any people coming in to this place. there are a few other regular drinkers in the place. just like the rest, they ignored the people around them. they had all the time and space to themselves. they're in a world of their own.

a world just the two of them.

he had his notebook opened. she had her books laid out on the coffee table. and a hot drink between them. its always nicer to share with your loved ones, somehow it taste nicer. like every couple, they we in love. really in love. i assume so cuz for one, he couldnt keep his eyes from her and the way he touches her. she was trying, really trying, to concentrate on her studies but hands are interlocked with his. he's staring straight to her beautiful face while she's trying look straight to her books and controlling from smiling.

they are really in love.

whilst trying to concentrate at her work, they whisper to each other, trying to keep the conversation very private and confidential.

they are anyhow in a world of themselves.

he must have said something. she must have heard it otherwise.
he must have really meant what he said but she took it as a joke.
he got really upset, she wasnt taking it serious.
he sulked, she was laughing.
he sulked, she kept quiet.
she knew something went wrong.
now both of them arent talking to each other. their face were looking straight to space.

no more smiles.

cold silent treatment is agonizing.

even though in the midst of their silence, they were still looking at each other. Only this time they're stealing looks from the corner of their eyes. she wanted to talk to him but retreats back to silence. he was looking at what she was doing but still, didnt want to talk. he sat opposite from her and read the papers. she saw the empty seat thats now beside her and his eyes were glued to the papers. he closes his notebook, packs his cables and notes. she looked at everything he was doing but didnt want to do anything to stop him. i'm sure she wanted to but somehow, didnt want to give in. and somehow, i'm sure he wished she did that too.

silence and coldness was in the air.

'hi miss, would you like to try our new blueberry muffin. please let us know what you think about it. thank you!' the barister gives a sample to her and to him. they looked at the barister and as soon as she leaves, they looked at each other. they ate it and looked at each other. he talked first. they were both prolly talking a one-liner to each other. couldnt tell what they were talking but he was still packing his stuffs. she gives up and packs her stuffs too and his face were stunned to what she was doing. they both had their things packed.

they were ready to go in anger.

the old lady from the next table were ready to take their cushion seats but they werent leaving yet. he talked to her more and hold her hands from going. they were getting closer to each other. he hugged her and held hands. the affection for each other were just to great to be contained. he sat down again with his things and she walked away. poor lady had to get back sitting on the hard chair cuz she knew they werent going yet.

she came back with the blueberry muffin.

**coffeexified**

sometimes, its really nice to just observed the people around you.

sometimes, you've gotta realised you're being observed.

sometimes, i've just gotta learn to give it a chance.

sometimes, its amazing what blueberry muffin can do.

song in head: rome wasn't built in a day - morcheeba

finally..!!

2008-03-29T16:31:00.003+08:00

sharks..

what was i going to blog about?

*thinking*

song in head: september - earth, wind and fire

my first time

2008-03-10T14:44:00.005+08:00

i guess its true that there's a first time to something.

first time the opposition won quite a big share in recent election.
first time many other countries having their elections.
first time America have a different look of the candidates running for presidential.

but for me..

my first time attending a chinese morning session wedding (fetch the bride).
my first time witnessing the whole ceremony.
my first time being the driver for the married couple.
my first time photo-sitting James' camera overnight.
my first time taking wedding photos.

i like it.

despite the election news, hoo-haas thats happening, the wedding made it far more interesting and joyful. it is afterall a happy occasion.

anyway, here are some of my photos that i took of my first time.

ps.. btw.. still not my first time voting yet.. hehe

another one goes

2008-02-20T15:19:00.002+08:00

keong hee!

2008-02-11T00:36:00.001+08:00

[ picture taken: gunung jerai, kedah ]

Keong Hee Huat Chye..!

i just love saying that in hokkien instead. for some reason, its easier to pronounce or sound more.. chinesee.

anyway, chinese new year has always been a big festival here in my little town. to the extend where the malls are actually closed for a day at least. smaller shops closes for longer days.

although, like every other year, there's..

1. traffic jam going back to hometowns
2. cars from every big city appears in the smaller town
3. traffic jam in the small town
4. traffic jam going back to the city

*sigh* isnt festive season the greatest after all.. :D

there's also the gathering of the family from almost everywhere. its kinda like once a year gathering and its also like the only way the younger generations meet with the other younger generation with hope that we'll continue to tradition of meeting each other - at least to my case.

and as always, since it happened two years ago, it is still happening.. this time a bit more.
"nahh.. this year i give you ang pow, next year you better give me back liao ar.." says an aunt whose kid is married with 1 kid already.

i think i'm "enjoying" my new year more each year..

oh well.. KEONG HEE HUAT CHYE!

i guess it is about time..

2008-02-11T00:16:00.001+08:00

for some updates.. :)

how's your year been.. or rather, how's your 41 days of 2008 been?

i think i should really get photoshop soon.. but at the mean time.. allow me to show off some pics from my SonyEricsson's camera phone.. hahaha

i had to use it cuz my camera ran out of battery..

song in head: always on your side - sheryl crow & sting

the end is coming..

2007-12-20T11:46:00.000+08:00

.. for the new beginning to begin.

song in head: next year, baby - jamie cullum

Next year, things are gonna change
Gonna drink less beer, and start all over again
Gonna read more books, gonna keep up with the news
Gonna learn how to cook, spend less money on shoes
I’ll pay my bills on time,and file my mail away, everyday
Only drink the finest wine,and call my Gran every Sunday

Resolutions, baby they come and go
Will I do any of these things? The answers probably no
If there’s one thing I must do, despite my greatest fears
I’m gonna say to you, I felt all of these years
Next Year
Next Year

I’m gonna tell you how I feel
I‘m gonna tell you how I feel

Resolutions, baby they come and go
Will I do any of these things? The answers probably no
If there’s one thing I must do, despite my greatest fears
I’m gonna say to you, I felt all of these years
Next Year
Next Year

sigh.. has it really been that long ago? lets hope that next year would be a good year :)

shh..

2007-12-11T21:01:00.000+08:00

i just watched 'enchanted' in the cinema with some friends, and i must say, its a nice show. its been awhile since i last watched a disney movie and like most disney movie, it normally leaves the girl wishing upon a star and all in the fantasy mood.

well, maybe just me. :) but really, its a nice show.

there is one part in the show when Pip, the chipmunk suddenly realized that he cant talk. and he had to converse in chipmunk language. and had to mime out in order to get the message across. then in the end, he wrote a book 'when silence is not golden' - or something like that.

when do we keep silent?
when do we speak out?

yes, i know there is a time for everything under the sun. and to be wise to know when to say when you need too.

but there are so much time that i wish that i could just speak my mind out. to just speak what i really have in mind. to speak out what i feel and my think and what i want to know. to really know what others think.

then again, the question that stops me would be, 'it is worth speaking it out?' 'is it beneficial?'

one time there were two friends that were really close to each other. the time that they spend with each other was more than just having fun. they hang out so much that they were comfortable with each other. like most other friends, they started sharing with each other their problems, their thoughts and their opinion. and like most close friends, they would only speak to each other their thoughts that most other friends would not know about. it was more than in-depth conversation.

one day, when one of the friend was sent away to another town, the friendship between these two friends began to fade. they met new friends, they met new interest in life. they lived separate lives. when they met again after awhile, there was the awkwardness between each other. they tried to talk again like how it used to be, but it only stayed surfacial.

both had lived a separate lives. but both knew each other's thoughts. both knew what they used to say to each other. about each other. the promises they made towards each other that never achieved.

the price is paid when too much is said, i guess. you're already like in a fear factor show by speaking out your thoughts or your feeling to someone. its a risk. well, its the faith and trust that you have towards someone that only you are willing to pour out everything or some secret. right?

what about the silent treatment?

i know that girls are usually known for using that weapon next to the crying. hahaha.. proud to be one! just kidding.. :) guys are learning that trick too. anyways, what about not speaking it out. not saying it out what you have in mind. not saying out what you want to say. the risk is there too. either you end up eating yourself up or eating someone else because of silence.

so, it is 'speak now or forever hold your peace' or 'silence is golden'?

'a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak' ~ king solomon, ecc 3:7

song in head: big girls dont cry - fergie

it wasnt me

2007-11-04T18:19:00.000+08:00

yes yes.. its been a very long time since i updated anything here. but seriously, its not my fault..

not my fault that i have quite alot of things to learn at work

not my fault that i have not much energy after work to go online

not my fault that i see this everyday when i can go online..

hehehe.. i have been blocked by super alot of websites at my client's place... cuz i'm suppose to be.. well, working.

anyway, if many that do not know.. i have changed job after 3 1/2 yrs there. i miss the people the environment. but, i guess i just have to move on. i still miss them.

but, in the new place - its been good. and crazy! well, i'm suppose to be at client site most of the time, so i hardly meet the rest of the colleagues. but we've heard abt each other. but still, my seniors that i meet everyday at work - they're crazily amazing. :)

since i have been blocked by SOOOOO many websites lately, when i can finally go online.. here's what i found out:

1. too many unread blogs

2. dont remember my password to friendster

3. dont recall all the new faces in my 'friends' list

4. found out most of them got married! [ whatever happened to 'hi, here's my bf/gf' ]

5. dont remember how to move around friendster

6. dont remmeber how to see MY own profile

7. everyone's on facebook pulak

8. everyone's asking me to join facebook in ALL my email accounts

9. what IS facebook..!?

10. forget to check out those unread blogs by then

sigh.. too many things at one time.. stress, man. hahaha..

yes, i havent join facebook.. YET

have some patience, ya *wink*

song in head: call me irresponsible - michael buble

a quarter

2007-11-04T16:52:00.000+08:00

yes.. finally reached a quarter..

still feeling good and happy.. and the same.

darn casino guards.. still want to check my IC .. (-_-)

song in head: i choose - india arie

ehwoo!

2007-10-01T18:44:00.000+08:00

[ a picture i took in pekan, kuantan using jon's camera. one of native kids there. ]

i donno about you but i'm loving this picture alot! makes me want to have the same expression as the kid.. maybe minus the snort-fluid.. hehe

anyway, october is here! soon will be november then 'jingle bells, jingle bells.. jingle all the way' ahh~ i'm loving it

song in head : aku cinta padamu - sheila majid

* dum dee dum dumm.. *

2007-09-27T16:04:00.000+08:00

too many times i have tried to update the blog, tell of my thoughts.
too many times i get caught up with other things.. events.. people.
too many times i neglect some stuffs thats closest to me
until its too late.

i'm trying

yes..i'm still alive and very much well. a few events had happend. some good and some bad. anyhow, i'm thanking God for what has happend. it is kinda amazing how sometimes simple events - that sometimes doesnt interest others - means the most to us. it is afterall a personal encounter.

no worries, i'm not trying to sound too deep - altho, my dahling housemate always think i am. maybe its my superpower.. fuh~ too much of Heroes. hehe..

i did have a few things in my mind that i have been wanting to tell it out but so far, with the time that i have, i will try. lets just hope it's soon.

at the mean time, i'd like to hear from you. tell me what has happened since you last visited here. its been awhile, dont you think? :)

coffee?

drum rolls, please

2007-07-06T14:19:00.000+08:00

i know nothing about drums or any musical instruments but hey, at least i know how to enjoy music.

in conjunction with our country's 50th year of independence, almost every event thats happening has "50" in it.

drummerforchrist will be having a big thing going on. they'll be playing the drums for 50 hours - non stop! and not just one of them.. a few..! talk about being loud.. starting on the 31st August at Sungai Wang.

if you play drums - go join in..!! it'll be great. they're attempt is to put a name in the Malaysians Book of Records..! imagine.. you're part of that big event. dont wait till malaysia is celebrating its 100th year instead. haha..

i'm not sure if a specific theme is required or you can just simply whack but just go for it!

like i said, i dont play any musical instruments at all, but i'll drop by. a few peeps would be playing too.. Altered Frequence, 1am, Unbashed.. John Thomas, Arthur Kam.. [ ok, i admit.. i only know 3 of the names mentioned ]

so.. ready for the drum rolls? ;o)

my wish list

2007-06-26T11:13:00.000+08:00

suddenly.. i just thought of listing it again so, i thought of adding to the list.

probably i'm just bored, or i'm extremely broke. but why is it that when you're broke is when you want alot of things as well. well, at least its motivating me a bit. hahaha..

in random order, i want..

1. canon 350d
2. 120Gb notebook
3. cd player for my car
4. ipod nano - cant believe now i feel like wanting it when i used to say this is an anti-sosial device.
5. trench coat
6. maybe a new cupboard
7. a getaway and do absolutely nothing
8. a nice chat over coffee with friends
9. play tennis again
10. have my 3rd piercing
11. go to rain forrest festival
12. scuba dive in labuan - or somewhere there

again.. whether i achieve it this time or not is another issue. for now, i'll just need to make sure i have the cash for it and complete my work before seeing my client later! sigh..

oh.. an interesting combination - jazz meets vocal

song in head: everything - michael buble

hmm..

2007-06-14T15:44:00.000+08:00

Useless fact of the day:

50,000 of the cells in your body will die and be replaced with new cells all while you have been reading this sentence‎.

[ updates later.. too sleepy to post something longer ]

a sympathy?

2007-06-07T12:55:00.000+08:00

disclaimer : what is posted below is purely my thoughts and my assumptions.

i'm not too sure if he needs to be sympatized or not. but then again, story has it that he was a betrayer, a back-stabber, the one doomed to be destroyed. he was also the one that needs to carry out the 'duty' in order the prophecy may be fulfill.

he is judas iscariot.

i had the discussion the other day with some of my girlfriends while discussing about this portion. he was a tax-collector. he loves money. he brought the pharisees to Jesus and thus, Jesus was caught, cruxified, etc. judas on the other had, got the money that he wanted - 30 silver coins.

so, up to that part, we know that he was the bad guy.

but if we read in Matthew 27, we read that he said 'i have sinned for i have betrayed innocent blood.' and he hangs himself. in the movie 'the passion', they potrayed judas being disturbed by all the little devils and all. well, who wouldnt be in sound mind after realizing that he just betrayed the Son of God.

my conclusion about judas was, what he did is probably no different from what peter did. peter denied Jesus 3 times. [ matthew 10: 32-33 "Whoever acknowledges me before men, I will also acknowledge him before my Father in heaven. But whoever disowns me before men, I will disown him before my Father in heaven. ] but what made peter one of the great apostles after that was, he repented before God after he realized it. judas continued in his wallow-pity-party.

so, that was my conclusion - God is a God of second chances. and that if we repent of our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive them.

but now.. my second thoughts is this verse. "While I was with them, I protected them and kept them safe by that name you gave me. None has been lost except the one doomed to destruction so that Scripture would be fulfilled." [ John 17: 12 ]

kinda like.. Jesus knew that judas is going to destruction (ie Hell) even before judas met Him. meaning, he is seriously, bound to destruction.

well, i'm sure there's a reason why he chose judas to be his disciple. i mean, his 12 disciple out of the many thousand people that Jesus could have chose. why did Jesus picked him and yet knew that he is going to be destructed.

at first i though that maybe, Jesus picked him cuz He knew that judas was weak - as in his temptation to money. so, probably Jesus picked him, trained and guided him be stronger when tempted. but.. 'except the one doomed to destruction'.

ultimately.. His thoughts are higher than our thoughts.

[ coffeexified ]

why is it that sometimes we want to do what is wrong when we already know its wrong..? or is it just me..?

unintentional

2007-06-04T15:35:00.000+08:00

unintentionally i took 1 whole month off from blogging. now i have 1 missing month in my archive. sigh

seriously unintentional.

[ coffeexified ]

i just thought i'd put up a pic.. something i saw from somewhere, decided to try out myself, learn photoshop [ thank you!! ] and voila.. what do you think? :D

what has happend to me.. well..

1. still cyber-coffeexified at starbucks.
but this time is really for work. sadness. i can be at starbucks really doing work. either that, or i have really lost my focus on what i'm suppose to do. it that time of the season when you've got something to do and more keeps coming. i've already got alot of overdue work and still in the midst of working on them. is time ever enough? of cuz not, thats what i'll say but i'll just submit to time.

2. change of style. still in the process.
no specific reason why i changed style. i just wanted to try something i've been wanting to try for the longest time - short hair. out of it, i've gotten some pretty funny responses:

you look younger! - thats what they tell me when i had longer hair.
you look more lady-like la.. - shorter hair, more lady-like, longer hair, more *what*..?!?
you look fresher.. - i must have been a walking corpse before this.
you just broke-up kah? - this was the ultimate. my friend asked me that cuz she said usually when someone cut her hair short is cuz she just broke up. the only break-up i had was with bank account - temporarily only *grin*

3. the big bang.
yes, my poor blue baby had an accident. shall not get into the mood of arguing whose fault but yes, i knock the person. i had to pay the bigger damage while the uncle's car only had a broken light. well, my poor blue baby had to be in the 'hospital' for a couple of days. i was immobile for awhile and i have forgotten how it feels like to take the train during peak hours. and the wonders of ppl i see on the train. anyway, the big bang kinda blew up all the other worries i have been having the past few days. all the work load, worries of other stuffs. so, the bang made me just chill off again.

4. relief.
in a few months, i'll tell you my big relief. but anyway, ever since i chilled out from my big bang, i manage to re-align myself abit more. think a bit more sensible. made a few friends with the mechanics, too. hahaha. but yea, one load off me. praise God for that.

5. off again!
if i dont blog for the next few days or weeks is cuz i'm still tied up at work.. before i go off to Bangkok for a few days holiday! ahhaha.. when i'm back, its crazy workload again. hopefully i can upload some pics.

[ coffeexified ]

i just met a self-claimed player. not too sure how to respond.

song in head : sweet escape - gwen stefani feat akon

i'm caught

2007-04-24T19:14:00.000+08:00

i am at starbucks now.. with my freaking notebook.. doing work, reading blogs, replying emails. what happened to just enjoy my coffee, timeOut, read a physical book?!

must be the revelation i had that i could online there.

argh! what happened!?

[ here's the story ]

i'm at this starbucks after work to get my mails cuz i was in the client's place the whole day. and i need to get some stuff settled before the next day. then as usual, got my coffee, on-ed my notebook and started doing my work. everyone around me also got their notebook on - for work, for discussion, for presentation, for surfing.

one adult came to starbucks - with his coffee and donut. looked around for a place to sit. twitched his mouth cuz there werent any clean table. then he found one. in the midst of all the other table that has notebook on it. i was one of them. he looked around. took a bite of his donut. looked around again as though he was lost in the techie world. finished his food, drank his drink. looked around again - thinking, whats happening. sip again, and another sip. looked around really lost in the crowd. then walked away.

got me to think. am i like the rest or am i like him. do i want to be like the rest or like him. enjoy the time without technology.

i used to wonder how can someone enjoy starbucks and notebook. what a contrary. until i started myself. on the notebook. talking to ppl virtually and not physically. doing my own stuff.

what has become of me..!?

i'm losing my mind.. soon

song in head : wake me up when september ends - greenday

the little things

2007-04-20T23:17:00.000+08:00

sometimes, its just the little things..

the smell of freshly baked pastries
the smell of coffee in the morning
email from awaiting person arrives
a short sweet suprise message
an old person in mcd having breakfast
elderly couple holding hands - interlocked
a funny remark in the middle of work
small suprises

that makes you smile. and makes your day.

oh.. another..

just a smile - does the trick too ;o)

song in head : overjoyed - jennifer hudson

only chinese

2007-04-18T17:32:00.000+08:00

[ if unable to view - check out here ]

what do you guys think about it? ;o)

the toy

2007-04-17T11:19:00.000+08:00

little tim saw on the tv a rider on a bike. he said thats they best thing and he wanted a rider on a bike toy. then one day, his mom brought him to the mall and there, at the far end, little tim got attracted one corner. he quickly ran to the corner and he saw what he wanted - a rider on a bike plastic toy. thats the exact one that i want to have, thought little tim. he wanted it so badly, he asked his mom hoping that she would buy it for him. it was a few dollars, so she agreed to get it.

on christmas morning, like how every little children in the world would rush down to the christmas tree to find their presents, little tim rushed as fast as he could to be the first to open. he found his present and he opened it. it was the exact rider on the bike plastic toy that little tim wanted from the mall he saw the other day. he was jumping up and down, smiling from ear to ear, playing with it as though it was really racing around the house. that was the best present that he has gotten that year.

his older brother, john, went towards him, grabbed the toy from him. looking, inspecting and shaking little tim's precious toy. he pushed the toy back to little tim saying, 'silly you', with a dissapointed tone. 'mom wanted to get you a bigger and better rider toy. but since you insisted that you wanted this silly plastic toy, you've missed out the better one.'

[ story told by my mum.. to ponder. ]

"The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters.." psalms 23

whats next?

2007-04-15T16:03:00.000+08:00

ever had the feeling that you want to do something but at the same time, donno what to do, how to do but just want to do something?

ever wonder how you can show your mood over just chatting online?

c : how come u like no mood wan?
f : how you know?
c : donno wor.. u sad kah?
f : eh, got alot of work to do, donno which one to do lor.. what you think?
c : i thought u sad... because... u r put into a situation that u don't want... which no one to help or guide... everyone not caring for each other... don't know what happening... no direction... don;t know what to do... want to go but cannot...
c : ada betul ah !!

either my friend knows me really well or it really obvious that i am confused. but anyways, yes.. i am in that position.

sometimes i want to know whats happening, what to anticipate. sometimes i like suprises.

sometimes i think i confuse myself more than i confuse others.

" Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. " Phil 4:6

update : it wasnt that 'time of the month'.. hahaha.. a friend just asked me. and before everyone else does., i tot i'll say it first. :o)

song in head : september - earth, wind & fire

first..

2007-04-15T14:42:00.000+08:00

yes, finally i have some time off [ literally ] to do some updates. there are alot of other stuffs that i want to say.. but hmm.. how should i start..

randomly la..

some of the many few [ oxymoron ] pictures that i took at my first overseas mission trip. some details:

venue : andaman seas, border of thailand and myanmar
people : 17 ppl - mixture of young adults and adults
duration : 1 week

ask anyone of us and we've all got our own stories to share. each and everyone of us have a different experience and encounter. let me tell mine.

we prepared ourselves a few weeks [ or is it months ] in advanced, but somehow, i still felt very unprepared for the whole trip. angela and myself had to be in-charge of the children/youth program - which was a challenge to me. well, although i am in the children ministry in church, i'm still clueless with children - especially of different culture, language. they is no speaking england. they speaking moken. we planned from the songs, to the visual aids, to the games. but still, i felt unprepared.

the day that we flew to ranong, and to stay at koh payam, i was nervous. seriously. and not knowing what to do. i just dont know what to do. i stared blankly as we were heading towards the island. where the people were. and when we reached the island, thats when the show begins.

i admit. i do not know how to approach people. i'm more reserved to myself. shy, in other words or introvert. [ somehow, i reckon, there're some of you that are saying 'yea, right!'. believe it! ] the whole day at koh payam, i didnt know what to do. kids were slowly coming out and looking at us curiously. all i did was.. smile.

then some of us walking around the place. talk to some locals. there are some that spoke malay and we found one guy that spoke really good english. still, i didnt know what to do. there were some of the guys that started playing captain ball. despite the language barrier, the moken guys could understand the rules and they played well..! really well..! and the score were really close to each other too.

one of us took out some balloons and we started creating shaped for the balloons. the kids saw and that got them attracted. but it was them that came to us, first. and thats was our first contact.

after the next day, the people recognized us. and the kids came to us. we started to sing some simple thai songs, couple of english songs with actions, and played some games. you can tell when the kids are comfortable with you - they get cheeky. they start playing tricks on you and being very mischevious too. also, they start to sit next to you more and got closer with you. thats when i knew, the barrier is broken.

but too late. we had to go on to the next island. i seriously missed those kids at koh payam. but it was a short visit there. we went to koh rhao. and it was again, the kids that came to us first before we went towards them.

anyway, to cut it short, it was really God that planned the whole itinarary. we may have planned a lot of things, but it was still God's show. all He needed was people that wants to be part of it. it was awesome.

i dont want a temporary encounter and thats it. i want to be able to have a continual encounter as such. but then again, i hate not knowing whats happening. ironic, aye?

well, dont we all?

song in head : ironic - alanis morissette

its a sleevy thing

2007-03-14T16:37:00.000+08:00

i have a few things up my sleeves..

i think i'm going to have more..

i thinking of more things to put up..

i think i'll just stick to my watch.

[ my fifth attempt to update my blog ]

let me try to really find time to tell you all what i have been wanting to tell you.. too much to say. i just hope i dont forget them.. *grinning*

at the mean time.. stay coffeexified ;o)

or... maybe..

you could update me about your happenings.. like some that went to kangaroo land, or gotten a new experiences.. hehehehe...

song in head : days go by - keith urban

can hold on..?

2007-03-08T17:35:00.000+08:00

yes.. i am still here...

song in head : hold on - wilson philips

keong hee huat chye

2007-02-15T18:02:00.000+08:00

wishing everyone 'keong hee huat chye' ;o)

and i will be away for 2 weeks..! yippie..!! away from work...! hahahaha..

gone

2007-02-14T11:14:00.000+08:00

gone!

its all gone..!!

everything's gone..!

no use turning back. there's no way for me to turn back. why must i go through this..!?

cant i patch it all back to be normal again..!? can i revert back as how it used to be..!?

must i go through this agony.. its not fair..!!

can i have it back.. please?

btw.. happy valentine's day to all you all

song in head : far away - nickelback

brighter monday blue

2007-02-05T13:57:00.000+08:00

just when you thought you knew everything about anything.. there's more.

The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as a substitute for blood plasma.

No piece of paper can be folded in half more than seven (7) times

Donkeys kill more people annually than plane crashes. [ a real ass ]

You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television. [ now, thats encouraging! ]

Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty (50) years of age or older.

The first product to have a bar code was Wrigley's gum.

The king of hearts is the only king without a mustache. [ clean king? ]

American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one (1) olive from each salad served in first-class.

Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.

Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning. Most dust particles in your house are made from dead skin. [ i'm still sticking to my morning coffee ]

The first owner of the Marlboro Company died of lung cancer. So did the first "Marlboro Man."

Walt Disney was afraid of mice.

Pearls melt in vinegar.

The three most valuable brand names on earth: Marlboro, Coca Cola, and Budweiser, in that order.

It is possible to lead a cow upstairs, but not downstairs.

A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why. [ something for the muso/sound engineer to ponder! ]

Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least six (6) feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush. [ gross! ]

Richard Millhouse Nixon was the first U.S. president whose name contains all the letters from the word "criminal." The second ? William Jefferson Clinton

And the best for last.....
Turtles can breathe through their butts. [ so, they fart thru their mouth..!?! argh! ]

-[ coffeexifed ]-

just thought of having a brighter monday blue.. well on another note.. chinese new year is around the corner! yippie..!

but then again, what i experienced last year, will repeat itself again. sigh.

song in head : once in a lifetime - keith urban

colourfulness

2007-01-25T10:52:00.000+08:00

i always wonder.. can life be more colourful..?

a green eye?

2007-01-18T15:26:00.000+08:00

suddenly.. i saw this clip.

its happening and its getting bigger. no doubt that most of us already know about this and it has been informed for the longest time. school children knows about it and adults talk about it. but what is there to be done? what is there to be done about global warming?

as of today:
malaysia : last year, flood striked the nothern of malaysia but the situation was moderate. this year, the flood has strike in johor and has left thousands homeless and 18 death. forecast says that the weather are begining to change for the better. lets just pray that the weather does but if it doesnt, i dont know how many ppl can continue to stay there.

oklahoma : freezing winter storms across the central U.S. plains killed at least 23 people in Oklahoma and snarled transportation across the country's midsection on Wednesday, officials said. read more.

taiwan : underwater earthquake hit and the internet connection was disrupted for almost the whole asia pacific. altho [ thank God ] there wasnt a tsunami like what happened 2 years [ or is 3 ] ago, there was chances it could have happened.

philippines : flood and landslide has hit there and has left many homeless and well, 23 death.

and many more here..

i dont know about the rest of you.. but i'm speechless. sad. scared. many times we would probably say..

left brain : eh.. you saw know about global warming ar.. more serious la
right brain : wahh.. so concern. so greenie. go do something la
left brain : our earth mar, of cuz must concern. if not we die early leh.
right brain : okie lor.. you go do something la
left brain :do what leh? donno la..
right brain : donno then how to do? then how? aiyoh.. come la. we go drink teh tarik first la.. coffee better la.

thats a typical conversation that we would probably have or at least the thought. i have had that thought before. but somehow now i'm a lil more scared.

well, i'm confused now. we are responsible for whats happening, wouldnt you say? but at the same time, the world is developing. new technology and infrastructure taking over. world's population is increasing.

but what can we really do..? for real.. enough about talking and discussing about it and no action.. but now to really do it. to have an action for what we say.

is there really something we can do now..?

[ sorry if it sounded very 'greenie' or factual. but its something i felt when watching it and pondering abt it ]

'we lived in this world and we are going back to where eternity is with God. He created this world for us to stay temporarily. He loaned it to us. are we destroying what is His?'

randomness of random

2007-01-17T10:49:00.000+08:00

almost loosing my thought for awhile and dozing off while at work.. eh, i need to relax a bit also la.. help me.

had the best experience in a recent retreat. its a big exposure and eye opener. well, partially during the night cuz i was extremely sleepy. however, learned alot.

been waking up really early these days.. but still dont seem to be able to have enough time to relax before leaving home. and somehow still reach work a lil late.

there's no reason for anything that happens. must there be a reason for everything? if there is.. explain why am i always caught in a jam only to find out there's really no accident or anything after a stretch.

i need sleep.. i need sleep.. i need sleep... badly. listening to jazz or R&B during working hours is not a wise thing to do.

ah.. a lil better already.. as for now.. :) hmm.. now i think i really need to learn how to edit my pictures..

song in head : photograph - nickelback

something new

2007-01-05T17:40:00.000+08:00

been trying to change my blog banner for the longest time.. and finally..! hahaha.. but its a bit small.. not wide enough.. anyone can help..?!

oh.. what you all think abt it..? still in the midst of learning and editing it.. :)

oh well, been playing with Serif PhotoPlus - something i normally use in my documentations but i didnt realise it can work like Adobe Photoshop.. and the best part is.. i didnt realise, all these years.. i actually have Adobe Photoshop in my other notebook. sigh! oh well, now something for me to learn.

but i guess, things like these do happen. something new happens. something we didnt realise was infront of us all these time. something that we can deeply appreciate now. all about timing? maybe.. well, i've been experiencing alot of this 'new findings' and its been going well.

change is good - like how pastor would have said it a hundred of times. it is a challenge to look at the new and to accept it. but it is possible. [ altho i still think the old menu at food foundry is better than the current new one.. sigh ] i want new challenges, new perspective.. new look? hahaha..

but i dont want to totally forget the past. i dont mean cling onto and not letting go the past, but to remember the past as how it used to be. as memories. occasionally, i love to go back memory lane again [ not the shop ] and just to smile and remember the moment. i realised that the old film camera takes better shot than my digital shots. hahaa.. oh well.. still learning.

anyways, it is a new year, therefore, a new begining and a new challenge shall be. God knows whats going to happen so, trusting Him in it! ;o)

song in head : the four seasons , wilson philips - 2 songs, donno which ones to put.. so put both la.. hehe

what defines a lady?

2007-01-03T10:40:00.000+08:00

[ was watching My Fair Lady, and this song kinda fit this.. why cant a woman be more like a man - Henry Higgins ]

do i need to wear a skirt always?
i'm more comfortable in pants
i better in shorts
but forgive me when i run aimlessly
i'm just a woman having fun

do i need to put make-up?
i'm not the type that will effordly make-up
or interested in the latest shade
but forgive me when you see me plainly
i'm just a woman simple as can be

do i need to be a lady-like?
i'm not soft spoken
neither am i a roaring lion
but forgive me when i act like one
i'm just a woman speaking my mind

do i need to smile sweetly always?
and constantly in smiles?
i will have my ups and downs
but forgive me when i'm expressing
i'm just a woman of expression

do i need to hide my feelings?
i might be good at secret feelings
and i cant hold for too long
but forgive me when i share it with you
i'm just a woman with feelings

do i need to be playing a piano
or even sing sweetly like a bird?
i can croak like a frog
but forgive my inedequacy in arts
i'm just a woman of different skills

nevertheless
don't be suprise to see me in skirts and heels
in make-up and hair tied up
sitting quietly in a corner
i'm just a woman, just being one.
[ blurred esh, 26/12/2006 ]

i never said woman are easy to understand.. just love them! :D oh, BLESSED NEW YEAR to everyone..

may all the resolutions that you guys have planned work out and may coffee continue to taste ever so good everytime, anytime.

song in head : new day - avalon

tv deprived?

2006-12-26T15:58:00.000+08:00

[ can someone please enlighten me: why do ppl press down at the lift/elevator when they actually want to go up..? ]

i may be out-dated or just not following the trend thats happening these days in the media. i shall, anyhow, declare it: i have not watched tv drama series for years!

literally 'years' since i moved to kl [ wait, the last series i remember watching was betty la fame - some foreign series ]. anywayz, since i moved out from home and stayed on my own, 'home' has no tv - unless you have your own in your own room. its not like one tv shared by everyone anymore. my parents can testify that i used to glue myself to the tv - to the extend where my grounding was no tv for a week. but now that i'm on my own, i have not watched alot of tv shows.

and with the current tv companies showing all the tv series - english, korean, hong kong - i have missed out even more. aside from the fact that by the time i reach home is around 8++pm [ considered early ], i dont really have much time to watch anything. [ movies in cinema is a different story ] so, when everyone around me is talking about one tree hill, 24, smallville, lost, etc etc.. i'm clueless. when everyone's talking about some character falling in love with another person, some character just killed someone.. i'm blurred. when everyone's talking about the next series thats coming and their prediction.. i'm lost.

its not that i have anything against tv series or that i'm that pathetic to be 'out-of-the-tv-world' but it just came to my realisation that, i have not watched tv series for a very long time. when i'm back to my own home, as usual, i'm glued to the tv. [ eh, need to 'pay back' the months i have not watched tv ] but when i try to watch the famous-talk-about tv series.. i'll switch to axn or travel & living after less than 10 mins.

of cuz shows like [ last time ] 90210, class of 98, ally mcbeal got me 'religiously' folllowing them and always got me day dreaming to think - what would it be like if that were to really happen to me? will a guy talk to me like how it is said in the tv? would i react the same way like in the tv when a guy approaches me? sigh.. it is very dramatic, to think about it.

since i dont have a tv series for me to follow, i guess i'll just follow my life's drama series. [ nope, jelly, no murder or split personality involved.. just coffee ] but think about it, what if my life [ or your's ] one day turn out to be a drama tv series.. how would it be like? what kind of character am i potraying?

oh well.. stay tune for the next episode of 'blurred about life's simple complexity' ;o)

ps.. having said all that, i do wish to get a plasma/lcd tv when i have my own place, of cuz.. hehe

song in head : searching my soul - vonda shepard [ theme from ally mcbeal ]

blurred christmas ramblings

2006-12-20T14:39:00.000+08:00

there's a point in time when sometimes its good to just trash out everything at one shot. just for the fun of it.. well, okie.. just another excuse to update my blog when i'm not sure what to update.

christmas is around the corner and i'll be spending this yuletide season in KL..! [ oh, yippie..? ] not too sure if its a good thing or not, but after talking to my mum.. i realised, i dont want to spend my christmas in a 6 freaking hour bus ride! now, thats sad. well, of cuz i'll miss my family but then, i've got a 'family' here too that has taken care of me.. so, here's to this year christmas in KL..! whats my plan..? i havent gotten a clue yet.. hmm, i've got some voucher thats going to expire soon.... [ *dum dee dum dumm...* ]

christmas shopping can be fun :D that is of cuz if i'm loaded *sigh* this time for the first time i actually did my christmas shopping for a few days and i still havent gotten anything much. i'm lost for ideas. but i saw some pretty cool clothes and hats for myself, though.. hehehe

[ gotta focus on getting present for ppl, not for self.. focus, girl.. focus.. ]

[ okie.. i tried! ]

i bought for myself a book. my christmas present.. haha. Go Girl! by Mardee LeDai. sounds like a feminist-anti-guys kinda book? well, rest assured.. its about girls travelling - whether alone or with a partner, missions, business trip, holiday or just a trip down town. seeing God in all the trips that we go and just being a pilgrim on a pilgrimage. the book is a bit more focus for girls cuz girls are more adventures! yeah! hahaa.. okie la.. also cuz girls tend to think a lil too much when just planning a getaway. Go Girl! encourages girls to just live out for travelling dream, pack your bag and GO!

"So issue an invitation to yourself. Challenge the everydayness of the familiar. Take a trip. Go somewhere. Go anywhere. Go where nothing matters but the adventure itself." [ more ]

now.. where should i start my first travel.. i'm still thinking about places like bali, vietnam, nepal.. maybe terengganu, kelantan, labuan.. or maybe i'll just start off in the offskirts of kl.. any one interested? :D
[ and i'm at chap 4.. progress! i just got it abt 1 week ago.. haha ]

on the off note.. i learned.. that Scotts tissues is rough and bad for the nose.. Kleenex is nicer, softer.. better for runny nose and sneezes.. i guess now i can be singing rudolph the red nose reindeer if mine turn's red.. talk abt getting christmas present for myself!

how's your christmas mood coming along? share!

song in head : colors of love - boyz II men

its time

2006-12-08T18:18:00.000+08:00

let it fill the air

and the hearts of every men

that its the time of the year

where christmas is to be celebrated

[ song in head : my grown up christmas list - clay aiken ]

jump! jump!

2006-12-07T18:09:00.000+08:00

feeling light.. feeling like jumping.. feeling happy..!

reason..? nothing
not that i've got nothing to worry
not that i've got all my trouble gone
do i need a reason to be happy..?

=)

[ be coffeexified ]

song in head : on the street where you live - ost from my fair lady

out!

2006-11-23T12:53:00.000+08:00

hahaha.. i'm out and out and out..!! *i'm lovin' it.. padappapadaap*

okie, to be exact i'm going to be on leave for a few days. [ yippie..!! *firecracker* ] i'm so looking forward for this break. i've got so many things that i want to do. so many things that i need to do. so many things that i wish i could do. hmm.. lets see..

1. camwhore [ for once a bit syiok sendiri ]
2. lepak [ when the whole world is working ]
3. shopping
4. go travel around KL
5. do some hse cleaning
6. change my wardrobe [ well.. dont think this can happen la ]
7. my long overdue writtings
8. christmas planning, other plannings
9. timeout session
10. do sth crazy .. maybe do these..?

one thing i love when i get to go out and just lepak, hand-loose is i can be in casual clothes and sometimes.. just sometimes, i can wear something i dont normally wear - no, no skirts! muahahaha.. also, i can just move around, do something with no specific agenda. no specific time to end my day. [ now i feel like jumping around ] anyone want to join..?? *grinning*

actual fact.. i've only got half the day to do all the crazy stuff. then UNITED LIVE will be coming to our church for concert.. well.. then my other stuff that i need to rush for - camps.

sigh..

so much for wanting to do all the crazy stuffs.. unless.. [ looking at calendar.. ] ;o)
have a fantabulous early weekend ahead..!!

song in head : i'm loving it - justin timberlake

sleepy friday

2006-11-17T14:25:00.000+08:00

me : sigh..! seriously stoning..
friend : hahaha, go do something about it
me : ~o) .. tahaning till 2pm for it
me : initally suppose to be 3pm.. then 230pm..
friend : now 2pm lor... make history
me : ....... 10 more minutes.. 10 more minutes..

stoning at work today.. should i still lepak today after work..?
0_o"

anyways.. what is the best way to stay awake at work..? please share..!

[ not telling the answer to the mind teaser yet.. hehehe ]

song in head : the way you make me feel - michael jackson

blurred me..?

2006-11-16T11:54:00.000+08:00

i've been reading some pretty interesting news..

it was under the perculiar posting in msn news and what caught my attention was.. it would have been more perculiar if he survived the blast.

wonder what was he thinking when he did that.. gosh.. madness..

------- [ coffeexicating ] -------

if ads were creative, its sure to catch someone's attention. and we're all asked to 'think-out-of-the-box' most of the time.

so, this Hong Kong ad to promo yogo was really an interesting idea to show flexibility.

and its definitely.. catchy.. not like i'm in any creative also la.. hehehe..

anyways, there's this other ad that i find it.. well, perculiar too..

Life-size stickers of people were stuck on automatic sliding doors at a mall in Mumbai, India. When someone approaches the doors move apart and it feels like the people on the door are moving away. The person enters to find the message 'People Move Away When You Have Body Odour'.

ouch..

------- [ coffeexicating ] -------

anywayz, here's a little quiz for you to try out..

Four people need to cross a rickety rope bridge to get back to their camp at night. Unfortunately, they only have one flashlight and it only has enough light left for seventeen minutes. The bridge is too dangerous to cross without a flashlight, and it’s only strong enough to support two people at any given time.

Each of the campers walks at a different speed. One can cross the bridge in 1 minute, another in 2 minutes, the third in 5 minutes, and the slow poke takes 10 minutes to cross. How do the campers make it across in 17 minutes?

hehehe.. i'll tell the answer the next time i post up something.. at the mean time..

coffeexified, y'all

song in head : take it all - hillsong united

dialing thoughts

2006-11-10T15:43:00.000+08:00

will we talk again?
i have seen you from afar
i have heard of you for awhile
i have wanted to call you
when will we talk again?

something like my previous post but of a different view.. well, at least i think so.

when a friendship [ or a relationship ] is broken or distant for whatever the reason, i'm sure there are some thoughts that come across your mind..

thoughts of what happened in the past
thoughts of the smiles and laughters shared
thoughts of conversations and secrets shared
thoughts of what that person might have been doing
thoughts of how it ended [ fullstop ]

either its just me but i've think quite too much [ when i should be thinking of my work! ] but yea, just thought how friends relationship can be made and drifted just because of a wrong words, action or just no effort to follow up. and sometimes the hardest part is to build that relationship again.

time might be able to help to build that relationship again but it might not be the same as it used to be. the openess and the gap may be a lil different. but its still workable.

provided there's the initiative to start.

recently, i've met up with some extremely long lost friends. some when i was in highschool and to hear their updates, its amazing. and to calculate how many years we've not kept in contact - freaks me! [ shows that i'm actually getting older ] but i appreciate my friends that called me and we've kept in contact again. there's so much to talk about and just to update one another about their lives and their upcoming. teasing each other about the past goals that never achieved. and just to see how each of have changed from younger days to now, moving to adulthood. and the best part - to be able to meet up again.

but there's also some friends that i've met and heard from afar. friends that were once close and now drifted far. must i wait for a few more years again before we dared to talk to each other again? when will we talk again?

my mom told me that relationship is the most important thing in one's life. thats why we need to build our relationship with our Father too. but if we have problem building relationship with our friends we see, what about our Father thats unseen. well, just a thought on a blurred friday.

song in head : all over again - ronan keating & kate rusby

dinner at 8pm..?

2006-11-06T12:19:00.000+08:00

went shopping a lil, got home from one whole day out, did some chores, suppose to meet up for dinner with some friends, then.. it rained outside. oh well, good time to just laze on my bed. then.. *beep beep*

friend : to your opinion, what would you define as a perfect date?
me : O_o hmm, main motive is just to spend time together. if about environment, maybe jazz music, not a crowded place, somewhere comfortable and coffee! hehe.. which hot chick you trying to date la? hehe.. (^_^)
friend : no movies kah? no la.. i'm just trying to understand girls better.
me : oh.. haha.. my advice is dont try to understand them, just love her and you'll know whats the perfect date to have with her.
friend : har? *sigh* sad to say but i hafta agree with you.
me : *grin*
friend : i guess at d end of da day, it's still down to da personality huh? whether can click or not, able to communicate or not.. go with da flow, baby
me : haha! main thing is if you really love her and she loves you in return la..
[ wah... like a script line from donno what lomantic movie ]
friend : uh huh.. but wanna spark it ma.. hehe

when my friend asked me that question, i was thinking - fine dining, wine, a performance, walk down the beach, all beautifully dressed up - those sorta stuff that you see from the movies. but then, every girl would define their perfect date differently. so, if we know what the other person would enjoy and i guess to see the smile at the end of the date, that would be the perfect date.

then it got me thinking, what would be a perfect date with my Father?

currently in church, we're doing 'hearing the voice of God' and how samuel really desired to be with God. how he really 'just wanted to spend time' with God. we could be spending time with God with our devotion, reading His word.. but at the same time, thinking about lunch, about the jacket you saw the other day, about what someone said, etc. so much for a 'perfect date' with our Dad, huh?

so, what's your definition of a perfect date?

[ this morning my friend asked me *again*, would you expect a flower from ur date? O_o ]

song in head : the way you look tonight - tony bennet

blur off days - kk pt 4

2006-11-02T13:45:00.000+08:00

[ okie.. i might just continue blogging.. unless.. ]

i promise this will be the last about my KK trip. altho i've got tonnes of interesting experience there. haha.. i'm still waiting for the pictures from the others that went so, you'll have to wait together with me.. haha
okie.. a quick one..

after nearly breaking every muscle from the climb for a few days, we went white water rafting. my first time i totally love the experience - 10km, 7 wackos, 1hour in brown sabah river. hahaa.. we were screaming our lungs out, falling out from the raft swimming and being 'saved' by our guide. and i got a cert from that! haha..

when we going to the destination, we had to get on a train. it was really an ol' fashion train. said to be the fastest in KK [ cuz it was the only train ] and if you're lucky, you might just see some chickens or ducks on the train too! so, when we had to go back from the rafting place to the train station, the train broke down. we ended up waiting for 3 hrs before the we got on the train [ and missed the chance to eat crocodile meat. darn! ].

anyway, on the train, managed to catch up a lil with stephen - cuz the rest were dozing off. well, after the screaming and energy used while rafting, stephen slept on an empty seat. i was looking out the window - gazing at the fireflies and ponder on some thoughts.

thoughts about what has happened.
thoughts about what could have happened.
thoughts about why it happened.
thoughts about why it didnt happened.
thoughts about how can i make it happened.

oh well, ultimately, its about submitting my days to Him. whatever that has happened in the past has happened. many times i wished i could turn back the time and make the changes [ maybe like actually study for my spm..haha ] but now, to see what has happened as stories in my life.
not easy to submit especially when you want things your way, but its to have the trust in Him. so often that statement has been said and now its time to actually live it out. :)

[ want to know what i was pondering about..? hahaha.. over coffee la ]

other quick update on my kk trip

burn, baby burn : i had sun burnt. i didnt put enough sunblock and went swimming at the clear sea water - so smart of me leh. it was so burnt that i could still feel the heat after 2 days. my dahling hsemate had to help me peel my dead skin.. eeww... but it was fun. [ some #!*^%$ chinese girl in a mall asked me if i'm a chinese..!! ]

revelation : i found out a cool remedy. when you climb mount k, you're sure to have extreme muscle pain. go swimming. seriously.. swimming help ease the pain. you at least can walk properly - unlike a crab on labour. so yea.. so snorkel or swim or whatever. its really good.

so yes, thats for my kk trip experience. fuh~ syiokness.. i enjoyed myself.. but i dont think i want to climb the mount again. hahaha!

[ darn... cant upload my pictures.. oh well.. ]

song in mind : put your records on - corinne bailey rae

to or not to..?

2006-10-26T13:48:00.000+08:00

to terminate my blog or not?

currently, my company just moved to a new place.. and i had some difficulty accessing blogger. proxy? firewall? whatever.. its not as easy as it used to be. so, it harder for me to blog now.

even now my current sitting place is not as.. erm.. secured, private as it used to be. so.. chances that i might stop blogging is higher..

i'll give it to end of this year and we'll see how it goes.

[ sigh.. need my 2nd cuppa already.. and there's not hot water dispenser here..!!!! ]

hugz

2006-10-13T10:10:00.000+08:00

hugging is healthy.
it helps the immune system, cures depression, reduces stress and induces sleeps.
it's invigorating, rejuvenating and has no unpleasant side effects.
hugging is nothing less than a miracle drug.
hugging is all natural.
it is organic, naturally sweet, no artificial ingredients, non polluting, environmentally friendly & 100% wholesome.
hugging is the ideal gift.
great for any occassion, fun to give and receive, shows you care, comes with it's own wrapping and, of cuz, fully returnable.
hugging is practically prefect.
no batteries to wear out, inflation-proof, non-fattening, no monthly payment, theft-proof and non-taxable.
hugging is an underutilized resource with magical powers.
when we open our heart and arms, we encourage others to d othe same.

huggiez to y'all

song in head : the gift - martina mcbride & jim brickman

blur off days - kk pt 3

2006-10-09T16:29:00.000+08:00

toured and visited

with muscle cramp all over me.. *sigh*

seriously, if anyone is planning to climb the mountain, i guess the best exercise anyone can do would be taking the stairs. and i mean ALOT of stairs. the whole journey up and down the mountain was like stairs everywhere! i underestimated myself thinking that coming down the mountain was easier than going up. well, technically it is but with the muscle cramp you had earlier, coming down is worst! but faster la..

anyway, we went around KK visiting a few places - philipino market, sutera harbour, jesselton harbour, waterfront. its really interesting to go to places and really be a tourist. we were walking around talking in hokkien and really acting like a 'jakun' fella.. haha..

i must admit, east malaysia is a very beautiful place. i was in kuching just a couple days before flying to kk and it really beautiful.

kuching - the place is clean, big and i love their bilin [ a kind of wild fern veg ]. their seafood is lovely and my client gave me 2 fresh water fish to bring back to kl..! first, i was shocked with their present. second, i dont cook! oh well, its the thought and my cell cooked it well. kuching or rather sarawak is known for the pepper industry. so, when i visited one of the souveneir shops.. they were selling alot of pepper stuff - pepper sweets, pepper jelly sweets, dark pepper chocolates, white pepper chocolates, chilli pepper sauce.. i was so tempted to buy the chocolates to let other ppl try but.. its okie. shall try not to be so adventures.

aside from that, i manage to look around at the houses in kuching.. fuh~! crazy madness.. its.. huge..! and i really mean huge..! oh.. beautiful too of cuz.

i didnt manage to visit much in kuching but i would love to go there and visit again. love to see the houses and the also taman sahabat [ frienship park ] .. its beautiful. any available tour guides?

kk - its more laid back and relaxed altho there are some jam during peak time. but what is jam if compared to kl crazy jam that can last for 3 hours! i love the fact that its near the ocean.. the harbour.. probably because i love beaches in general [ my next stop would be terengganu or kelantan beaches ]. i love their lemon drink, 'kit chai peng' [ lime with sour plum ]. cant get it here in kl unless i make it myself.. hmm.. going around with my friends were really the best. the wooden handy craft is beautiful and pearls! they've got fresh water pearls and ocean pearls and donno what other pearls sold in the philipino market! hahaha..

a few things about east malaysia that i can roughly conclude..

1. the land of the four wheel drives - my little kelisa is like a little ant there!
2. awesome seafood and really fresh - we can pick the fish that we want to eat!
3. the land of huge houses - too much land and really very nice.. *sigh* when can i get one..?
4. really fresh air - compared to kl la.. but with the current haze.. err...

i told ivan about my trip to east malaysia and i really enjoyed myself.. he said.. i should find an east malaysian husband.. (-.-")

i would really want to go to east malaysia again.. maybe to labuan? diving..? hmm.. anyone interested? ;o)

blur off days - kk pt 2

2006-10-05T18:47:00.000+08:00

climbed and conquered..!

hah..!

after months of planning and no training at all.. i have climbed the highest mountain in south east asia. it was madness to climb it. walking and walking and walking and losing my breathe and gasphing every step.. only to realised i've walked for 500m.. and i had 6000m to reach the rest place. and another 2500m to the peak. sigh..

started off walking with some friends then it was with one friend.. the it was alone. well, occasionally i met some foreigners along the way and ben the squirrel. but it was good. the view and scenery was awesome.. literally breathe-taking, too..!

then it was the journey to the peak. i partnered with angela [ she's a great travel buddy ] and it was amusing how we encourage each other to go to the peak..

10 more steps.. 10 more steps..
breathing stop.. *pant pant* 0.o
gotta reach the top.. dowan to come back again for it..
it madness...
10 more steps.. 10 more steps..
jappos coming to overtake.. quick.. run..
dont let them overtake..! [ kiasu ]
breathing stop... deeeeeeeeeep breathe..
10 more steps.. 10 more steps.. hug..!!

and we did it..! muahahaha.. [ i couldnt take any pictures up the peak cuz my camera froze up there. now i feel like getting another camera.. *scouting* ]

the scenery was awesome.. mixture of rocks and clouds.. it was just awesome. reached to the peak took some photos and started our journey back to the camp area. as i was walking down, i was amazed at the journey down and i couldnt believe that i actually walked all the way up [ at 230am ]. the way was steep and long.. like really long. i dragged myself to go down.

that was the time that i wanted to scream my way down. i just wanted to scream and stay where i was and sulk [ for some reason ]. i just wanted to roll myself down.. the journey down was actually harder than going up.. anyway, dragged my way down with some help of the guide person.. he was afraid that i was going to fall anytime [ i slipped once, haha ]. he helped me walked on the easier path and *voila* i reached on easier steps down.

yet i didnt quite understand why i was so grumpy on the way down. probably cuz i'm just tired and lazy.. maybe i'm just fed up [ for no specific reason ], maybe the journey down was too tough, or maybe there's no goal to reach for already.

is this the same in life? when you have just reached the top to what you think you have achieved and when you're at the top and nothing's moving but just downwards.. how to handle that? when you think you have gotten what you wanted but you just got to let it go.. in order to move on.. how to handle that?

well, i guess it could be seen as another way. we all may have worked really hard to reach the top or to achieve it. and with all the craziness and madness trying to achieve it, there is a sense of fulfillment once we've reached it. there's the enjoyment, the excitement.

when actually.. what awaits is.. rest. to rest in His presence and relax. :)

hahaa.. yes.. thats what i learned from the climb up and down. it was seriously crazy coming down and i actually ended up having more muscle pain when coming down from the climb. i couldnt walk or stand straight.. it was as though a crab trying to walk straight with muscle pain..!

kinda think.. maybe the mountain conquered me back. O.o

song in head : climb every mountain - sound of music

blur off days - kk pt 1

2006-09-27T19:28:00.000+08:00

i went east..

i have climbed..

i have swam..

i have rafted..

i had muscle cramps..

i had minor altitude sickness

i had mossie bites that still lasts..

i have sun burn and now peeling..

oh heck, i had a GREAT time..! ;o)

too much to say now.. let me get my mind nicely organized [ while i do the same for my overdue work ], then i'll tell what i went thru in the east.. *grinning*

song in head : private party - india arie

gulp!

2006-09-12T17:19:00.000+08:00

i have no idea what have i just gotten myself into..

going to fly away from the city for a week
going to the east for the first time.. well, second actually
going to 'conquer' the mount
going to 'conquer' the skill of rafting
going to eat rare weird food

..

going to add my list of places been
going to torture my muscles and bones
going to burn my already dark tanned skin
going to test the optimistic side of me
going to try to be adventures

..

what have i gotten myself into this time.. any advice?

[ will be away for a week to east malaysia, kota kinabalu.. yippies + gulp ]

free..?

2006-09-12T16:52:00.000+08:00

nothing's free..!
nothing's free..?
yea.. nothing's free..!
not at all..?
everything has a price to pay
or at least a catch to it.
then what does 'F.O.C' means..?
thats old stuff, unwanted, useless
there's nothing free in this world

a free biscuit given to you..?
thats for try out
a free meal given to you..?
thats for an occasion
a free ride given to you..?
thats for helping others
a present given to you..?
thats for birthdays
a free money vaucher given to you..?
thats donation but will still take it
a free blank cheque given to you..?
thats a bounched cheque or some hidden agenda
a free advice given to you..?
thats for guidance
a free passport to heaven given to you..?
thats pure crap and impossible
there's nothing free in this world
nothing's free..!

[ blurred post thoughts ]

i overheard my colleague talking about a scam he encountered in one of the mall's carpark, where he was given free gifts and well, it was a scam la. then they were talking on how there's no such thing as free things.

it got me to realise.. how to tell someone of the salvation in a world where the word 'free' is actually 'NOT free? what happened to the price that was paid for us by His blood for us for us to have a 'free' access to heaven..? would anyone believe in 'free' again..?

nothing's free..?

missed calls

2006-09-05T14:40:00.000+08:00

[ was reading some blogs and well, just thought of some stuff.. in the midst of my work time. girls are multitasking..! dont argue.. *grin* ;o) ]

will we still be talking when we've lost it?
will we still keep in touch when its over?
will we still think of each other when its gone?
will we still do what we used to do.. together?

you can either inteprete that short stanza as a(n)..

love relationship breakup effects
it is only natural that it happens. i mean, 2 person together sharing everything together, all the talks and feeling they shared together and when its over *snap* everything else also ends. communication stops.. thoughts, action are 'supposely' to be forgotten and not-to-talk-about. i guess its what some would call it - healing moment. to heal from the hurt and pain..
but like what yasmin ahmad's tagline options - does friendship ends when love begins? when the love is over.. is the friendship over too..? how does it take to heal from dissapointments?

friendship forever - only if you online and stay nearby
i remember how i used to deco autograph books for my close friends in high school and we shared the best time together. cycling around and just hanging out together. but as the years goes by and everyone moved to different places, its hard to keep in touch with anyone. well, not unless you've got the internet but even so, not everyone goes online at the same time. and with new people that comes into our lives and the time spent together.. the older friends are sometimes forgotten.
i'm sure not fully forgotten but just left as memories. and when we 'try' to make an effort to meet up.. usually doesnt work.
i had the same conversation with my dahling hsemate and she was saying how ppl talk more online and just because others dont have internet, the friendship is not as strong as those who online. well, even though i'm on y!, msn and gtalk.. i hardly talk to everyone. makes no diff.
should i then delete their numbers from my mobile and just maintain them online?

unanswered cries
to God, that is. sometimes we just want to hear an audible voice, a confirmation, an affirmation. but when nothing is heard and nothing is done or the storms in life gets tougher.. thats when we blow up, leaving everything behind and doing things our way. and that [ possibly ] can backslide anyone easily.. well, yea.. many times we would say or sing that we will trust in Him, having Him as our desire.. a typical Christian answer la.. but when it really happens, will we start to move with the wave?

well, maybe not everyone goes thru this but i do with additional assumptions..

relationships - family, friends, loved ones, strangers - are important and clearly, the effect of it if it doesnt work out can be massive. there can be total silence between each other. like kids, we would be nice to the person but as soon as (s)he does something that you're not happy, we say 'i hate you'.. either verbally or quietly.

i guess, thats why God so wants to have the relationship with His children. but if the child wants to rebel towards God, then the relationship is jeopordized.. we jeopardized that relationship unintentionally. communication is just as important in a relationship.

then it brings to another conclusion.. it shows that friendship, relationship can be temporal.. and might not last long. what more if we only met that person once or if we will never meet the person anymore.

what impression are we leaving behind to everyone we meet and say goodbye..?

IMPACT..! what can one life do..?

[ tudiah.. chimness.. this is what happens when i finally got my timeout session. ]
song in head : dont know why - norah jones

blurred malaysian

2006-08-30T13:11:00.000+08:00

merdeka..! merdeka..! merdeka..!!!!!!!!!!!!

independance day is tomorrow and its time to show the patrioticness part of me.. sleeping! haha.. i'm still recoving from my lack of sleep..

anyways, i was just browsing thru some blogs and came across some pretty interesting test to show.. the malaysian part of me.. *grinning*

How Malaysian are you? - The Challenge

Your score : 25 out of 45 (56%)

You’re there, but there’s plenty of room for improvement. To start off
your journey to becoming a true red-yellow-and-blue Malaysian, make sure you
don't forget those little Malaysian flags that purebreds stick on their cars on
Merdeka day.

not too bad, i figured.. about half of me lives out like a real malaysian [ eventhough the fact that i was born and lived in malaysia ]

then, i came across kennysia's and it was another interesting test..

Congratulations Fay, you are 33% not
Malaysian.
That means you're as Malaysian as...

Michelle Yeoh!
How Un-Malaysian Are You?

i'm like michelle yeoh..?!?! errm.. right.. i dont want a french (or whatever) husband that can be as old as my grandfather!

anywayz, if 56% of me makes me a malaysian and 33% of me does not.. what about the remaining 11% of me makes me..??

i know... here's my equation..

malaysian me - 56%
not malaysian me - 33%
blurred - 11%

hehehe... ;o)

happy merdeka, everyone..! kopi-o, y'all..!

[ my prayer is that may God continue to bless malaysia with His peace and blessing. and may His glory be revealed more each day. ]

coffee-ful

2006-08-29T14:18:00.000+08:00

[ literally dragged myself out from the bed and decided to be in black since the weather was so tempting for me to sleep again. on top of that, i had a msg in the morning from my bro NOT to drink my coffee in the morning.. stoned all the way to work. anyway.. to cut the long story short.. i had STARBUCKS coffee from my bro this morning for work! as a prezzie.. special delivery in the morning.. yippie...!!!! ;o)

and everyone else in office is staring at my cuppa.. hehe ]

since i'm in a coffee-ful (as to joyful) mood.. i got a lil coffee destress email from my uncle.. thought i'd share it with you guys..

A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university lecturer. Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life. Offering his guests coffee, the lecturer went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups:
porcelain, plastic, glass, some plain-looking and some expensive and exquisite,
telling them to help themselves to hot coffee.

When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the lecturer said: "If you noticed, all the nice-looking, expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is but normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the better cups and are eyeing each other's cups."

"Now, if Life is coffee, then the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain Life, but the quality of Life doesn't change. Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee in it."

So please, don't let the cups drive you...enjoy the coffee.

coffeexified and coffeeful, y'all..!!

[ still very happy with my starbucks coffee *grinning* maybe i should wear black a lil more often.. hehe ]
song in head : i'm so happy.. oh, so happy [ improvised version of 'i'm so pretty' - Anger Management ]

nostalgic

2006-08-14T11:30:00.000+08:00

for some that may have read my previous post, i've been thru some stress tiring time at work.

today, i'm a lil more relief as i'll be moving into another project soon, this week. and now that my previous project that i was struggling with is over and done [ except some occasional emails and calls from clients ], i have some time off.

so, i was listening to some old music - Frank Sinatra. a close friend compiled a whole collection of frank sinatra songs for me cuz i really like his songs [ thank you so much! really appreciate it alot! ]. well, it gives me a sense of relaxation and well.. swinging. hehe.. also, it makes me feel like my timeout session in starbucks.. me, coffee, oldie, book.. what better combination. ;o)

but.. since i cant go to starbucks for my timeout session [ yet! ], listening at work with silence around me.. this works good enough for me.

one thing i really enjoy about my timeout session is it gives me a time to reflect on what has happened. reflection on what has happened, what i've done, what i've been through. it allows me to have some time to myself.. well, probably coffee with my Dad. ;o)

dear Dad,

how are things? i really miss spending time with You. i mean, over coffee without the rush at my favourite spot. i think i know why starbucks is near the arrival hall.. cuz to see the joy of people meeting their loved ones over a cuppa.. priceless. its like when we meet up with You again in our own ways.. its a priceless feeling, huh? yea.. i want that again.

i've got so much to say and yet i dont know how to arrange it. i dont know how to word it. i dont know how to express it. *sigh* a mixture of feelings now. haha..

well, just though i'll drop a note to You, Dad.. i miss you.

your blurred kid,
-[ eshnah ]-

listening to: frank sinatra - it was a very good year

seeing things differently..

2006-08-11T15:21:00.000+08:00

regular paper clips now have faces.. :D

[ eh.. i'm very busy at work, ok.. i just need to destress myself. ;o) ]

blurred random shots

2006-08-02T14:58:00.000+08:00

one of my many random pictures.. (^.^)

i'm suppose to be there to see her.... theresa, quick bring her here..!!!!! *sigh*

blurred july update

2006-08-01T15:02:00.000+08:00

well, not that i didnt blog at all in july.. but july felt soooooo long. in actual fact, july is the only month with out any public holidays.. (revelation...? haiyah, just check the calendar la)

too many things happened in july and yet, i feel like i've been doing the same thing the whole month. hahaha..

looking out
just last saturday, a young TARC student was slashed by 2 guys on a motorbike. he died minutes after that. he was apparently walking his way back to his condominium around 8++pm when he was attacked.
this happened just about 10 mins walk from my place.

i've walked and jogged at that place before. i've walked at night at that place before (not alone la).

well, things like these happen but it just didnt occur to me that that the young guys (age 18) got killed somewhere near where i stay. there are other 'common' incident - snatch thieves, but i've not heard of this for the past 3 yrs staying there. scary but anyhow, i pray that the blood of Jesus will protect everyone that stays there. also that the devil will not dominate the place..!!

a taste of relaxation
i had a foretaste of my relaxation last weekend with wai yi and we just chill out kau-kau in the curve. (didnt have my camera with me cuz 'someone' is still holding unto my camera battery charger!!) had sushi, listen to a dude singing green day's september - seriously, he's good.

then we watch Lady in the Water - M. Night Shyamalan. because...!!! tokyo drift is no longer drifting in the cinema..!!! *darn!*
but the movie was good. my 2nd m.night shyamalan movie. hahaha

[ for those planning to watch it, just go for it! its quite a typical m. night shyamalan kinda show. the show is about a bedtime story.. ;o) ]

there and then
had a few trips down memory lane while talking to my friends. talked about the people i met in college, all the funny things that happened. talked about the high school days when i usually wear big t-shirts.. (talk about fashion taste!)

also, talked about sports.. gosh, now i really miss playing tennis. not that i'm that good or anything but i just miss whacking the ball really hard. its a good way to de-stress yourself, though. miss going for tournaments and having the smell of sunblock the whole day long.
miss the early morning training and evening games.
miss squeezing and getting a tennis court - cuz its usually full. [ well.. talk about being physically fit! haha.. ]

uncle siva..!!! can come to KL and play tennis kah? i've got my tennis racquet here.. probably need to change the grip and strings.. a lil karat-ed. hehe

oh well, i guess i'm in KL now.. better make the best of it.. haha..
moved on to the working world, memories in the past will cherished.. :)

[ emo or not..?? hehehe.. well, how often you get that from me, right..? *grin* ]

belief..? believes?

2006-07-27T18:10:00.000+08:00

i'm confused and this time really blur about life.

i'm not too sure why is it such a big things? and its published in the papers.. is it suppose to be some kind of reminder to everyone to start staying at home or a tourism strategy?

i was talking to one of my colleague cuz she just gave birth to her first child..

me : eh, bring your baby out for us to see la. since pictures tarak, show the actual 'product' la
colleague1 : cannot la. people say that she's not fully developed yet. scared got the outside virus and her body cannot tahan.
[ huh? and i tot virus and bacteria can go thru any tiny hole in the universe? ]
colleague 1 : anyway, now hungry ghost so better not to go out. later the ghost will disturb my baby.
me : err. okie (changing topic) my sister also giving birth soon.. next month! :D
colleague 1 : oh really.. so good la..!
colleague 2 : it (hungry ghost) only imply in err.. china, taiwan and.. malaysia.
me : O.o *blurred*
colleague1 : yea hor.. the chinese ghost only disturb chinese ghost. US ghost disturn US ppl only hor *giggle* but donno why the US ppl not so effected by it.
me : well, its more on what you choose to believe mar.
colleague 2 : its better to believe it in than not to believe in it at all.
colleague 1 : yea yea..
me : huh..?! well.. its really what you CHOOSE to believe. i choose to BELIEVE that the ghost will not disturb me and ..
colleague 1 : ahh.. that's because you're a Christian.. different!
me : har..!?! O.o *maximum blurrified*
colleague 2 : it is a very sensitive issue.. better dont talk about it liao..
[ conversation ended ]

i'm still stunned..!! i mean, why do they believe that the ghost will disturb them when they can choose believe that the ghost will NOT disturb them.

then it made me so want to ask them.. why do you believe what you believe..? do you believe just because everyone else is..? because thats what everyone said..?

*sigh*

[ speechless ]

well, i must then THANK GOD for giving me this realisation and to even build my believe stronger..
1st hand faith.. a personal faith.

[ something really cool to look and read.. http://www.art4soul.org/work/ghost/01.htm ]

blurred blurts random thots

2006-07-21T10:20:00.000+08:00

deprived from entertainment.. need to go shopping and relax..
for some reason, i really want to just hang out in a mall.. or somewhere.. (with someone/people maybe? you figure.. muahaha!)
lousy fella been enjoying too much lately..
while me still stuck with work.. *sigh*
got presentation on something that incomplete..
need to work on my 'consultant' talk more.. hmm.. :D

i've now got wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeels.. yippie!!!!
know what is it..? *nyek nyek*

sometimes i wish i was in the media/entertainment line..
sometimes i wonder why i took up IT..
sometimes i wonder if i can integrate IT and media/entertainment together..
sometimes i wonder what would it be like working for event organising firms..hmm..
sometimes.. i've got to stop day dreaming..

saw this blog style in Jelly's blog... should i try it too..?? hmmmm.. maybe after august.
talking about style.. should i change my style as well..?
any suggestions..? ;o)

hmm.. thinking of piercing another earring...

thinking of the beach..
wanting to go to the beach..
anyone want to go to PD anytime soon..? *grinning!*

still waiting for my icecream....... :P

seriously coffeexicated!

.....

*fuh..* that felt better.. now back to work....
i've got a few ideas on things to post already.. just need to find the time.. hahahaha..

[ feel free to blurt out something here.. its fun! serious.. ;o) ]

football fever

2006-07-03T16:56:00.000+08:00

and the world's talking about it.. seriously.

at nearly every place, regardless of the weird hours.. everyone will be staying up to watch the world cup. even if the match is at 3am and work starts at 9am.. (or even church service on sundays! ehhehe). and heard that some shops in germany are closed for the world cup fever.

seriously fever, man!

the main headlines is now the World Cup scores. mobile services giving out the world cup scores for each match. everyone's selling anything that has to do with the teams playing in the world cup. or even, some people talked abt it and get freebies for doing that!

well, not that i have anything against it. it just amazes me. world cup is way more happening than the olympics! and other sports that are happening around (like the French Open) are not so happening.. probably just me cuz i dont really follow the news. well, you dont see the world going frenzy when the Wimbledon is in action.. (hmm.. maybe when the russian chicks are playing.) other than that.. not as crazy as World Cup.. amazing.

i was taking a cab to the train station last weekend and yes.. i talked to the cab driver (again!). this time, he didnt teach me about marriage.. but rather, ended up talking about football. world cup in particular. talked about the brazilians, the french, the germans (they won! and i am getting FREE icecream for that! yay!! :D ). pretty interesting conversation. he talked about how people bet during such games. and especially how the whole had their confidence in brazil to win.. and when the brazilians lost.. fuh~! the devastation...

well, it was a short trip so, yea.. a short conversation too. we had a nice conversation.. though he was the one that did most of the conversation.

oh.. forgot to add.. the whole conversation was in.. cantonese. those who knows me well enough.. my cantonese is only those simple verbs.. well.. thank God for football having 'quite' a universal language - the teams name. hahahahaha..

now that my favourite team, brazil, is out.. who should i support? the germans..?? considering that i am going to get a FREE ice-cream for their win over argentina.. wowh..!

*grinning*

[ ps.. interesting site.. http://www.jesusandtheworldcup.com/ ;o) ]

break of day

2006-07-03T10:04:00.000+08:00

break of day
Originally uploaded by faycheng.

on my way to work and this is what i saw in the morning..

Good Morning, Lord..!

over coffee: when God laughs - part 1

2006-07-01T14:49:00.000+08:00

[ its not the first time someone has writen about this but its just something from me. ]

A father carries his child into his arms. He looks into his child eyes. And he smiles. Showing funny faces and funny sounds but she looks at her father in puzzlement. She can't help it but to start a giggle. She laughs. Then, both father and daughter starts laughing together.

Every parent loves to see their child smile. What more if the child gives the biggest smile and laugh. Instantly, parents would be smiling too. Well, I'm not a parent yet (one day, i pray!), but seeing a kid around with a big smile, i can imagine what a joy it would be.

It is the same with our Father, too. He constantly would want to see us in smiles and laughter. Imagine, when He first saw Adam walking around the garden of Eden and exploring everything around. Adam would have gone really near to the skunk. To his puzzlement, the animal has a white stripe on it with a rather bushy tail. He decided to go nearer and thought he could pat the little creature since the dogs and cats allowed. As he got closer, suddenly.. Adam ran as fast as he could from the skunk coughing. Thats when he realised that it stinks!

Or when Adam decided to take a dip in the river in the first morning he was in the garden. Since he enjoyed himself the day before, he walked slowly and probably still half asleep towards the river. As soon as his body got onto the water, he was wide awake and started jumping around because the water was feezing cold.

And imagine, when Adam was in deep asleep, and God decided to prepare a suprise for him. He took one of his rib bone and created the most beautiful creature with elegance. Created every single part and chose the best character because He knows best what Adam likes. Morning came and God showed Adam the 'suprise'. Adam speechless, smiling from ear to ear and couldnt keep his eyes away from whom God introduced as Eve.

Imagine how God would be laughing.

I believe that God is still looking down at us and well, still laughing at us too. As a Father looks at His child. With all the little funny gesture, actions that we do, brings amusement to Him. With our laughs and joys, I'm pretty sure that He is smiling with us too.

As a child to my parents, I would want to see them smiling at me too. And to laugh with me. For at least I know I'm not subject to any problems or grounding. We would talk over dinner or on the way to somewhere of funny incidents that happened. Well, most of the time, my dad or my mom would start teasing each other and occasionally, I would tease both of them. I remember once when my sister decided to lie on top of me (in a way squash me) just to wake me up in the morning. I would scream and pretend that my fats are squeezed out and that I was going to be paper thin. My mum would just say, 'Haiyoh!' and goes away laughing.. (not helping out of the situation! sigh). But to hear laughter in the morning or any time of the day, is always the best medicine.

But the hard part is, how do we maintain smiling at all time? In time when we are challenged, sad or just being-grumpy.
How do keep ourselves smiling and our Father smiling too?

[ to be continued.. ]

argh!

2006-06-30T13:08:00.000+08:00

yes..
i'm in a midst of rushing for my documentation, i have alot of testing and documenting to do.. and all to be completed by today.. well, monday to be the latest.

i have couz tonight, church activities tomorrow and on sunday as well. is there enough time?

my fault.. i should have done it earlier but i didnt. sigh! talk about pulun-ing (malay slang for rushing)

..... brains not really focusing ..... ("-.-)

when this documentation is done.. i'm going to..
1. shop kau-kau
2. get new pairs of shoes
3. go for movies - still wanting to watch tokyo drift!
4. lepak somewhere kau-kau
5. have my long lost timeout session
6. scream my lungs out
7. sleep kau-kau
[yes.. i'm just motivating myself now..]

sigh...

still... i have to do whats infront of me now.. first...!
blurpoint: how do you guys handle stress?

coffee anyone..?? i think i'm going for my 2nd cuppa soon...

one of my many 'stress-and-donno-what-to-do' post.. no worries..i'm still.. blurry coffexicated.

blurred moments update

2006-06-29T12:22:00.001+08:00

a short quick one..

had a few huge moves in a month - church, work, and life!
"No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. - 1 Corinthians 10:13"

more to come? probably.. well, i like what my mom says about problems.. they're God filtered.
if God allowed his people to wonder in the wilderness for 40 yrs,
if God allowed Jonah to be swallowed by a big fish,
if God allowed the flood to come for 40 days,
if God allowed Job to go thru challenges,
if God allowed Jesus to be hung..
so.. what's your/my problem?

easy said than done.. well, who said life was easy? but life can be fun! *grin*

all that i do
"So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. - 1 Corinthians 10:31"

imagine doing everything, i mean everything! eat or drink.. do it for the glory of God.. not just when we are with people or when we are in ministry.. but everything! *sigh* something i still need to remember cuz many times i may/have hurt others without realising.
but still, i guess it is also to see God in everything that happens is something we tend to forget..

erm.. to see God when we drink? ;o)

blurred snap
i should probably really consider taking another hobby seriously.. hahaha. i was taking some pictures during my company's function - using my colleague's expensive camera. hehe.. ada gaya. i have not taken so many pictures in one function before. and my hands actually hurt more than me playing 4 games of bowling! i learned..

taking pictures without flash is nicer, but tend to be blurry in low lighting
taking still objects is easier than people - cuz they move too much! *frust*
taking candid shots are fun!

but then i also realised..
i'm not in the pictures at all.... *hmmmm..*

oh well.. thats my update.. as for now.. and now, i really need to catch up on my documentation which i am so so so behind schedule..

coffee, anyone?

coffeexified...

2006-06-23T09:46:00.000+08:00

Mocha Frappuccino

Hyper and driven, you'll take your caffeine any way you can get it. Frappuccinos are good, but you'd probably chew coffee beans in a crunch!

What Flavor Frappuccino Are You?

*********
coffeexified, y'all..!!

;o)

i am ... years old

2006-06-21T14:08:00.000+08:00

You Are 18 Years Old

Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe.

13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.

20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.

30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!

40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

****
louziness.... no wonder people think i'm still in college.. heck, someone actually thought i was still in highschool...

louziness..!!! *bleah..!* :P

cramp

2006-06-12T14:56:00.000+08:00

i is trying to cramp all my thoughts in one post.
i is trying to update my blog.
i is attempting to blurrify me readers.

fun! hahaha

random musing 1
kids these days are seriously very smart. was just talking to a 9 year old kid about IT stuff - gigabytes, megabytes, mp3, file transfer. and this kid even knows what's a gynecologist! i didnt even know there were names for such doctors till i was in college (i think). they're too smart. sigh.. whatever happened to adults fooling them with craps and they believe it. *sigh*

random musing 2
was travelling back from church to home by cab and the friendly guy taught me a thing or two about marriage.

cabbie: girl, next time you want to find a husband, you must make sure you check his background. his family background. everything. then when you two want to buy a house or any property, make sure you insist to have your name together. at least your name is in the property also. then if anything happened, he cannot disturb you cuz your also own part of the property.

me: *??!?* err.. yea, check his background but if we're going to get married, should have faith that nothing will happen and if it does, should work it out, right?

cabbie: yes, but you donno what can happen. people say love is blind. you check the dictionary. i am saying that you must be prepared if something bad happen.

me: (wah.. which dictionary la?) yea, uncle.. but they also say 'love never fails' (putting biblical truth) and..

cabbie: haiyah, you donno wan. when ppl in love, everything is like a fairy-tale but when get married, thats when life actually begins.

me: yea, life as two ppl living together and....

cabbie: next time, i tell you, when you pregnant 8 or 9 months and your husband wants to go out, you also follow him cuz you donno, when he go out other girls will woo your husband cuz you're not there. when you go out with him, they will know that he got a pregnant wife. cannot disturb wan..

me: *speechless and stunned*

i was too tired, stunned and speechless to counter back. he continues to talk about how i should make sure i got enough money, education to support myself if my 'husband-to-be' leaves me. apa ni..!?
i wanted to say 'if you wanted to marry the person, you should believe that you are going to be together grey-headed and not when s/he is going to leave you' or at least talk about 1 cor 13.. but he didnt stop talking. *sigh*

how would you handle that kind of situation..?

random musing 3
following up a little on yasmin ahmad's mukhsin production and seriously, i cant wait for it to be done. well, it is still in the very early stage la. a movie about orked's (character from her previous show 'sepet' and 'gubra') first love.

yasmin ahmad's coming out with the tagline for the show and one of her tagline was really interesting.. 'does friendship end where love begins?'

i would say.. it is possible. depending on the individual-la. but so far, from the ppl that i know, it takes awhile to build the friendship again if love ended.. what do you think?

NO, I'M NOT GETTING EMO! :P it just my random musing la.. hahaha..

oh well, tell me what you think.. :D

over and done. something new

2006-06-06T14:39:00.000+08:00

time passes
days come
events happens
memories kept
both sweet and sour
sweet to smile
when dark clouds overwhelms
sour to learn
when the storm is coming
but whatever it is
has happened and done
remember the events
forget the pain
and look up

the old are kept
maybe thrown
but will deeply cherish always
the new are displayed
maybe in use
but will forget it someday
pack the old in a box
have space for the new
to learn something new
but whatever it is
has given and received
remember the gifts
forget the price
and look up

all that has happened
it over and done
its unchangeable
so
look ahead
we're yet at the top
move on
expect better things
hang on
there's more to come
trust Him
He knows what He's doing
all for
His love for you

playing: can i go now (jennifer love hewitt), be myself again (eric benet)

animal planet

2006-05-25T09:46:00.000+08:00

ever wonder whats the difference between a lamb and a sheep? and whats the significance these animals are mentioned? along together with goat and ram?
well, i guess not EVERY single things in the bible are to be interpreted literally but just wonder.. whats the difference..

i looked up the dictionary and here are some of the definition:
lamb - young of the sheep, innocent mild-mannered person; dear person; without resistance or protest
sheep - grass eating animal kept for its flesh as food - mutton - and its wool, (and interestingly.. the dictionary quotes this) separate good and bad person -> Matthew 25:33 (as to differ from sheep and goats)

so.. lamb is the young of the sheep (clear enough). blurpoint 1#: when Jesus said, '.. i know my sheep and my sheep know me (john 10:14)'.. what about the lamb? does it mean that only the sheep - ie, a matured christian - can hear and know Jesus? well, in a way it does makes some sense cuz (my thinking, my thoughts, my intepretation) only when you're older that you can discern and identify with a familar voice. for example, a babe may respond to anyone that calls their name while an older child can recognize better their parent's voice.

it is also mentioned in john 21:15-18, when Jesus resurrected and talked to peter. He said in order.. 'feed my lambs - v15', 'take care of my sheep - v16' and 'feed my sheep - v17'.
Jesus mentioned about the lamb first then the sheep twice.. so, to my understanding.. its, we should guide the young christians, take care and guide the matured christians well.. and only a matured christian can help other matured christian.. right? and we need to be matured christian - hebrew 5:12-14.

then another question: why is Jesus mentioned as the Lamb of God..? why lamb and not sheep? well, this is when i think the second definition of lamb is more appropriate. not that Jesus is young lad (heck, he is most matured compared to anyone of us!) but because of his 'innocent mild-mannered person; dear person; without resistance or protest' character that he carried even to calvary. hmm.. then no wonder lambs are usually used for sacrifice.

hmm.. then, what does this verse mean? Isaiah 5:16-17

But the LORD Almighty will be exalted by his justice,
and the holy God will show himself holy by his righteousness.
Then sheep will graze as in their own pasture;
lambs will feed among the ruins of the rich.

blurpoint: the sheep (meaning matured christians?) will have their own property and the lamb (meaning younger christians?) will have to settle for what the rich dont want?

ps: sometimes i tend to ask questions and answer it myself or cause others to be blur with me.. hahaha.. no doubt why i'm blurred most of the time.. hahaha ;o)

Dear God

2006-05-18T17:14:00.001+08:00

Dear ~~God~~ Dad..

i prefer to call You 'Dad' instead. closer feeling and more personal. well, you are my Dad afterall and since i'm your child, i guess you would have known me inside out. but anyway, i just though i'll write you a letter to you.. been ages since i last wrote one anyway. i think it was.. first year in college? never gotten the chance to post it.. its still lying in my drawer (somewhere).

anyway, how are you Dad? hows things over there? are the angels singing and rejoicing more than last time or have they lost the chance to sing cuz the people here are all confused. there's so many things happening here that people are asking more questions about you, Dad. media's been showing some news and shows that attracts them than to the church. well, i've read some of the books and its really very interesting. are those creativity from you, too..? well, i guess you do have you ways to train us to be stronger, right? i just hope some dont drop-out from the training but to continue to persevere.

sometimes i guess holding on can be a tough thing to do and to last long. i know how it feels when i was hiking up raub last weekend. gosh, i so wanted to give and screamed cuz the path was so narrow and i keep slipping down and the journey seemed endless.. but with a push from the back and a pull from the front of me, they've definitely helped me through.. really. and when i reached the top with the rest of the team.. it was just that sense of.. achievement.. i guess thats why you said 'Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work'. hmm.. so, that is why Jesus did called his disciples to go out in pairs to spread the news, too.. right, Dad? well, then.. i'm grateful for all the people that you have introduced in my life. somehow, one way or another, they've helped me with a push and a pull.. (hey guys, thanx for everything.. appreciate you guys tonnes!).. ;o)

Dad.. is it hard for you to make decisions? i mean..well, more like i wonder.. do you have to make decisions up there. i guess you have too, huh.. most obviously harder than mine. recently i've got to make some decisions that i dont know what to do. i dont know what choice to make. sometimes, i wish you would just zap me to somewhere.. hahaha.. well, then i would be like jonah.. i dont think i want to smell fishy. well, i'm trusting you with it, then.. help me, Dad.. i really need your help. thanx, Dad.. :D

the sunset is coming, Dad.. so it means, the day is almost over. it was great spending time with you.. well, writing to you, to be specific.. :) thank you for listening.

i love you, Dad..

your blurred kid,
- eshnah - ;o)

interesting facts 3# - comparison

2006-05-17T13:58:00.000+08:00

an email from a friend..

IN PRISON - you spend the majority of your time in an 8X10 cell.
AT WORK - you spend most of your time in a 6X8 cubicle.

IN PRISON - you get three meals a day (free).
AT WORK - you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for it yourself.

IN PRISON - you get time off for good behavior.
AT WORK - you get rewarded for good behavior with more WORK.

IN PRISON - a guard locks and unlocks the doors for you.
AT WORK - you must carry around a security card and unlock open all the doors yourself.

IN PRISON - you can watch TV and play games.
AT WORK - you get fired for watching TV and playing games.

IN PRISON - you get your own toilet.
AT WORK - you have to share.

IN PRISON - they allow your family and friends to visit.
AT WORK - you can not even speak to your family and friends.

IN PRISON - all expenses are paid by taxpayers with no work at all.
AT WORK - you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for the prisoners.

IN PRISON - you spend most of your life looking through the bars from the inside wanting to get out.
AT WORK - you spend most of your time wanting to get out and go inside bars.

Humm? Which Sounds Better?

i think i still prefer work.. at least i get paid to do work.. ;o)

blurred esh turns 1

2006-05-11T10:21:00.000+08:00

just realised when i was looking for an old post and i just realised.. i started blogging last year may..! so, i blog is actually 1 year old as at 12 may! (as of tomorrow-la)

interesting how times flies now.. hahaa.. just when i keep thinking 'what to blog' or 'when on earth can i find time to blog'.. i've turned one! hmm.. not sure if thats a good thing or not, now..

but anyhow, i've had the joy of blogging.. people discovering me from my blog, people finding my blog, me telling things thats in my head but that i think its fun to crap about.. hahaha..it a joy ;o)

how am i celebrating my one year of blogging.. havent a clue yet (sadly).. any ideas?

blurred facts : #1

2006-05-10T12:24:00.000+08:00

i is love to talk and people actually gets blur when i is talking.

**********
just thought i start something like this. just some random stuff about me that some may know or may not know about me.. no worries.. they're all good... well, to me la.. haha..